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Well, first of all, i would like to express my gratitude to everybody here. i have been invited a number of times but somehow I have not been able to get here but my apologies and i am very happy to be here. On the  other hand, you do have extraordinarily great teachers available, so where there is fault, there’s not much need of donkey.I have no idea what he said. But I am glad to be here. Now, to talk on the subject, which is — looks like I have been talking about habitual pattern lately anyway. But i do not know whether my own personal habitual pattern is happening here. I have no idea. 0:02:58.6 Okay. In Nijmegen last week, one evening we had a talk entitled in the Moment From the Habitual Pattern to the Awareness. So, on that basis, what we did talk was importantness of moment, importantness of awareness -- awareness on one individual’s habitual patterns. On these three bases we talked. So importantness of moment is also very important. We have to acknowledge, but in the Tibetan tradition we do emphasize rightly on the future but we ignore the moment of happening. So, but on the other hand when you emphasize the future, the future was shoved in the moment.In the moment becomes so important for us, and we must very much emphasize. Even if you emphasize more on the future,that is the one angle we should look into.Another angle we should look in, when you practice dharma, when I looked in  “how do we practice dharma?’ How do we do ?0:05:58.6 And I find that doing a number of different peoplefor example, number one, are a number of people who do, people who like to show that I am doing dharma practice.I’m not sure what they do inside but they really like to show externally even up to the extent of carrying mala and wearing it or whatever.I don’t want to go to the extent of talking about maroon or the yellow robes but that might not be right for me to say. We like to show that. I don’t know what they are doing inside.Okay. then another group of people sit and sit and sit and sit. Nothing but sitting. Another group of people would like to repeat, repeat, repeat — keep on repeating as much as possible. Don’t laugh. This is important. I notice what people do and I do too. Then all this different way of people do what we call practice. Then the question rises, what happened to the individual?0:08:56.8 To some people, that individual will rise tremendous amount of _______(fight?) So much so that they almost behave like supernormal animals To some people, it is very nice when they are sitting and repeating. However, when they go outside, dealing with the whole world, no change to the personality.And to some people, they go it is okay when you are sitting and when you are walking out, and it also has a good effect.So the question, what we have to do is what is happening to that individual? So to me, the answer is, unless you know how to deal improvement within the individual when you are dealing with the everyday world, I don’t really think it is a real deal of effect to the individual. No matter how much you repeat. No matter how much you sit. If you do not know how to improve yourself dealing with other persons, I don’t really think it is very effective to the individual. I’m sorry to say that, but that’s it. Maybe I’m a little bit critical but that’s what i observe. 0:11:21.9So why? What’s happening? That is important watch it. So what is happening is that people probably pay no attention to your way of thinking and your way of approaching but you are busy reading the scripture, saying mantras, or if you are like Zen tradition following just sitting, the simply sitting and if you don’t sit still you will get a head ___.Right? 0:12:36.8SWhat I am saying is people are paying more attention to reading or saying mantras or sitting rather than paying much attention to the effect on the individual.Then on the other hand, we also say you should be able to do everything effortlessly. We say at the higher stages, everything happened effortlesslySo then the question rises on my head, how is this effortlessly going to happen? How can we effortlessly do?

Then the thing comes up, whatever we have to do we can get angry or we have to develop attachment, we do it effortlessly. Somehow we begin to notice. Really, I mean it. We don’t have to learn how to get angry and we do get angry. We don’t have to learn how to fall in love. We do fall in love. And we don’t have to learn how to get attached to something when we see something nice, then we get attached.0: 15:11.0I have to use very funny language here.When somebody says “boo” to you, you automatically say what? You will automatically say what? F you. You don’t have to put effort in that. It automatically happens and when somebody smiles at you, you have to respond a little bit better. And when somebody is slightly skeptical about you, you have to respond equally. 0:16:11.5 It’s automatic we do. Why?Habit. We are totally no other reason but habit. Our habit. We sort of first learn that and that impression on our mind is picked up as habitual Then we work on that pattern, all the time.So, I began to realize where the point where we get angry, the bodhisattva develops love/compassion and that has become their habit. As like we have habit of getting angry straight away, the bodhisattvas automatically get compassion. 0:17:49.7So when it becomes habit, then i think that becomes effortlessly.So the question rises, how effortlessly you do it. You know when you talk about bodhisattvas effortlessly do it, buddhas everything they do effortlessly, blah, blah blah. And if everything happened effortlessly, we should not be here, right? Or every buddha would liberate everyone but effortlessly happening to them because they are so well-developed. They are so used to it that they are habitually better, like we are habitually getting angry, getting attachment, falling in love 0:19:02.6So, my personal thinking, and it’s only my personal opinion — but I think probably, when we practice dharma we should also put in the right thinking. So then we can work with that, and most of the negatives that develop are the delusions, anger attachment whatever it is. It is always developed with my _________, it is always 0:20:19.6So to be protected against that which we do habitually, when somebody says “boo’ we are ready to say whatever we are supposed to say, just like that, the negative rises, we have the automatic reaction of it. So the paying attention to our way of functioning, how we are building the habit, habitual thing, is becoming extremely important. 0:21:25.8  

Let’s say if you are meditating on lam rim, say we are doing importantness of life, if you keep on sitting inside and keep on training “life is important, life is important” that isn’t much,  but if you can make it deeper engraved in out mind: “hey this life really is important”, when you really make it deeper engraved in that, then it makes sense, rather than saying “life’s important, life’s important, life’s important”. Even when we talk about the analytical meditations, to be able to reach the conclusion on the point that life is important, the reason the analytical using, to me is not only to convince ourselves that life is important, but somehow to have engraved as our habit To be able to recognize that. That’s not so difficult because we do have a precious feeling of life which is very strongly engraved in our habit. 0:23:28.6So, that is important. And how does that happen, can happen to us, I think is by awareness. If we are not aware of our mind, what it is doing, then it is very difficult to make a strong, engraved habit. As many of us, including myself, we do, we keep on saying “Om Mani Padme Hum, Om Mani Padme Hum’ - supposed to say about 100 or whatever it is, after about 15, 20 or maybe 25, and then we begin to -- who knows maybe shopping or maybe working in the office, maybe the letters you have to write or phone calls you have to make, and by the time the other sensation comes on your head here 0:25:52.8,  that’s not going to effect the individual at allTo bring the habit, or the positive way of functioning, because we are not aware, we might have finished our commitment, said the words, and our mind is such a funny — it is capable of doing that and when I was a kid in Drepung monastery, I used to memorize tremendous amount of texts, tremendous amounts and I used to repeat them in the evening and I used to fall asleep and say it. And then I had a teacher, a manager come, sitting with me and he made me stand up and say it because I feel asleep. And when I stand up, I fall asleep and I can say it. I’m telling the truth, and then I have a room, three stories high and they made me stand near the window, and by the light and say it. And I learned a trick, to lay on the wall and fall asleep and say it . And after the thing I am supposed to say, when it’s over, one of the attendants will pick me up and I already fell asleep. And that’s true.But what happened to me? What did that effect to me? How did it matter because there is no awareness? Memorizing definitely helped me, but repeating in sleep, somehow I learned a trick, automatically, but that did not help me at all. So what does that tell me?It tells me two things: Our mind is capable to do certain things without awareness, and also, when  you do that without awareness it is not that helpful. So that’s what happens.

So when we sit, like the Zen or VIpassana style, just  keep on sitting without awareness, it might not be that helpful. Nor when we do Tibetan style repeating, maybe not that helpful either, and these things one has to pay attention. One must recognize awareness is key .0:30:20.5 If you don ’t watch it, your mind, you know what that does do? It is like a monkey, an uncontrolled monkey, let it go in the temple. What do they do? Throw all the things around, play all the bells and drums, At least drink all the water, eat all the flowers, what they do. So we have to pay attention. 0:31:07.1We have to pay attention. So, when you pay attention, meaning it becomes paying attention, Paying attention, awareness brings — it can make a hell of a difference. If you don’t have the awareness, we disconnect ourselves from the practice . The practice, we do it, but somehow we are not properly connected. So I think that is a really important point. And when you begin to acknowledge this, the practice becomes a part of life. The last weekend in Holland, i have been talking about bodhisattva activities and all this, trying to put into daily life practice rather than as paramita on that side 0:32:56.6 So the dharma practice when it comes together with our life, the life that we face every day, what we think, how we react, how we interact with human beings and if it becomes effective on that, it’s really working. I can give you one example. When we are meditating on love and compassion to all sentient beings what do we normally do. We sit myself on a huge ? and so-called all sentient beings sort of little black dots around. I mean it fills up every place. Probably there is no name. Nameless, faceless black dots filled up and then we generate wishing them happiness and we say how wonderful it would be if all of them are free of suffering I would like to make them free and bless me to be able to do all this. So that is what we do.So the moment things come up and someone reacts to us by talking, we react by bigger shock. And the you can’t handle it, you become a kind of funny guy. Don’t we do that? We do that. And that is a problem. The practice has not been able to handle the life 0:35:46.0

When life starts to function, you don’t know what to do with it. If you are going to spend the rest of your life going to the forest and seeing no human being at all, fine with that. But you can’t do that, so therefore you have to learn how to deal with every human being.

I’m telling you real truth, that’s my field. And that is why some of those practitioners, some of us practitioners are very arrogant persons -- probably they think they know everything and the whole world is under my thumb.Then we have some of those practitioners acting in that manner. I have seen it. Western practitioners. They really have a such of a kind of — like that. That’s because of those nameless, faceless dots started reacting to them. So in order for that not to happen, you have to be aware of the practice, and that practice — love, compassion, generosity, whatever it is — try to get in the habit of the individual. You are not going to get shocked, you are not going to freak out, you’re going to be a good person who knows how to deal with everybody. 0:37:49.2So, even if you meditate lam rim, or you say sadhana, whatever you do — sadhana maybe a little difficult. But when you meditate lam rim or something, somehow if you have to do it through the way of dealing with life, dealing with people, dealing inside the human beings, inside as well as dealing with outside. If you do combined together, then the beauty matter of the human being starts to wake up, shine.

When you are able to —sadhana may be difficult, but lam rim if you do it dealing  with individuals dealing with outside, rather than what the book says about it — this is the outline, this is the conclusion, so I must think like that. So instead of doing that, if you sort of compare it, bring it in to your life try to deal with that, make some sense of it and feel it. 0:39:32.6So, instead, I will give you  a little example. Instead of saying that life is very available because  there are 8 leisure and 10 endowments, so instead of looking thst way, you begin to see from the other angle, from the other angle, yeah, well I’m not that busy because I don’t have those pains and sufferings, so really, if I want to do, I could do it. 0:40:43.5So other than — the book says I have 8 leisures. So what are the 8 leisures? Ah— 1,2,3. rather than that— I can do it. I don’t have obstacles. Similarly, instead of saying the Buddhism here, the 10 endowments  these are the 5 external, the five internal, this and this. Although instead of saying this -- yeah. I really — sort of look from your own angle that things are possible for me to do it.So the balance between don’t lose the traditional outline yet we look from our angle, the person present - the moment person’s anger — see, this can be done, this can be done, this can be done. I’m not talking about the lam rim in general. I’m talking about the importantness of life, like 18 qualities and this. Instead of counting the 18, Buddha says I am a human being. Looking that way I have the opportunity, I can do it. Acknowledge that.Then at the end, instead of saying the recognition of important life, instead of saying that, you can say I embrace my life. And then that works better. I think that is awareness dealing with life. That embracing life, you can take it with you and you can go everywhere and have it with you. 0:43:45.7 Likewise, every step that we do, if we function that way, then two things happen with us. In one way, we are developing. In another way, we are changing our habit. So at the end of it, we get habituated positive way of doing. In the mean time, we are developing according to the experience gained by that.  So I think the balance of that is so important.I’m not making this a public talk, but I am sort of telling you that’s what — that’s how I feel, when you talk looking to habitual patterns, habitual awarenesses. I think that is the thing. We have to do the practice to make it habit. Not habit of doing practice. Some people say, I’m habitually developed to do practice. I ask “how come?” If I don’t do it, I’ll feel not good. I don’t think that’s habitually.So anyway, if you have any questions, we can discuss. You don’t have to make me the narrator here.0:46:01.2 You doing questions? SO like that, you know. Habitual awareness. If you pay no attention to our habit, as I’ve been telling you earlier, most of our non-virtues have been developed without noticing. If we can build up our positive, good karma --building up just like we do with negative karma -- how wonderful it would be really. But on the other hand, for me to say easily to change habitual and for you to acknowledge, for you to hear, it is easy but if you really have to do it it’s difficult. Why? Because you have to fight against your habit. The habit which has been deeply engraved in our consciousness — most of us here are Buddhist — in a number of our lives.It is extremely difficult. If you have to change our habit of a few days, A few weeks, a few months habit, if you have to change, how difficult it is. Right? How difficult it is. So that tells you how difficult it is to change the habit. Even before we change the habit. Even before we acknowledge the habit we have tremendous resistance. Denial. How much we deny. We all do.If we talk to each other, you say “I’m not angry, but. That but really tells you that you are not happy with it but your denial is there “I”m not angry” So we deny tremendously.

Our biggest first problem is denial 0:49:27.5 And our dharma practice obstacle is pretending. We pretend. Our negative avoiding obstacle is denial. Two of them is our first timing. 0:50:18.2 But what? That indicates to you something.  — that we are denying, pretending that  we are building a positive. Even I am pretending here. Even I am. It shows you how the engraved pattern here.

Just acknowledge. What’s the word? Even I am. Putting myself a little bit up there. Even I am pretending. So, forget about you people. Even I am pretending. That’s what I am saying. That’s what I mean. Maybe not consciously, but unconsciously. I’m saying that. 0:51:16.2 So the pretending is obstacle. Denial  is obstacle. Pretending will not let you show what you really feel. Or what you really are, what your problem really is. And when you aren’t really able to acknowledge that, how can you work with that problem? Similarly denial. You keep on denying that you are getting angry, you keep on denying that you are falling in love, you keep on denying with everything, how can you work with it? So first and foremost activity that we have to do is after the motivation — I would not put before the motivation — but after the motivation, you avoid the denial, cut the denial out and cut pretending out. t0:53:00.8

But on the  other hand, our practice — you have to copy.. And if we cannot imitate other practitioners probably we have nothing to practice. Either it is meditation, saying sadhanas, whatever, it is imitating too. We are imitating. We are definitely imitating. The fact is we have to do it. We have to imitateHowever, we should not be pretending it.There’s a difference between pretending and imitating. t:54:10.3 If we cannot imitate, we cannot do practice. Right or wrong?RIght. Right from the beginning. If you do not imitate you cannot practice.Totally.I mean it. Just look. The moment you say meditate, what reaction do western people do. Slightly you have to sit down and relax and do all sorts of things. Right? We’re imitating.We are okay with it physically, because we can see and imitate, its easy. We have a problem in mind because you can’t see, you can’t imitate properly, that’s our problem. 0:55:23.3 So we pretend. See when the lack of imitation comes up, the mind capacity — you can’t do it so you pretend to do it. You are pretending. You may be thinking — your mind may be cutting a vegetable or cheese, maybe or bread, for that matter, however you are pretending to be sitting there and meditating. So the pretending is because we cannot — mind cannot imitate the other mind because you don’t see it..Information is not properly transmitted or organized or whatever it is. The mind does not know to imitate that mind. So you get the problem of pretending and that’s not a big problem Sitting there is not a big problem. That becomes bigger. Any obstacles, any funny thinking that we get in the mind, we pretend we don’t have them, you know. Which becomes later — the pretending becomes later — you think you don’t have.  You are almost believing it.Then you really become some kind of funny clown. And we used to have some of those little Geshes in Tibet, in Drepung, the name is Shakya Sengye. Shakya Sengye is actually Buddha’s name but is technically used for -- Shakya Sengye, lion of the Shakya clan. They pretend that they know everything. In reality they know nothing. For them, everybody is “Oh yes, Geshe-la you really know everything don’t you? “ “Yeah, don’t I know, wow”0:58:24.0 It is our amusement, our teasing — we do have persons like that. tr That is how you become like that. It becomes a funny problem, particularly in the West

So I’m not going to go in that detail tonight, but anyway. So pull back, pull back, pull back, pull it back when you don’t know how to imitate, you have to make sure the pretending is not taking place. 0:59:34.0 So these are the preliminary dharma practice problems by not paying attention in the awareness as well as our habit. We can definitely talk more tomorrow. Anything else? That’s the end of my story, my opinion.If you have questions, it doesn’t have to be on this subject. Whatever it is. Maybe  — it doesn’t mean I’ll know everything, okay? We can discuss.1:00:39.4Q If you realize that you are pretending, is it smart to acknowledge it or do you have to do something else?R You correct, you don’t pretend, right? Pretending  — the bad pretending could even be one of those 10 non-virtuous, what we call, big lies. That is really bad. We should immediately change it. If not bad, but here a little thing, there a little thing, a little bit of pretending is excusable, but we cannot really let it overtake us, because if it overtakes — the pretending overtakes — all our lives will go for pretending. 1:02:33.6 When our lives go completely for pretending, we are not going anywhere. That’s because we may have some virtue of saying the mantras and some virtue of sitting down or something, but beside that I’m not sure. Since our purpose of involving in the spiritual practice is to achieve something or to improve it or in New Age language to uplift your soul. Or in Christian language, bring it close to heart. All this, is supposed to be our purpose, whatever it is. So the purpose is defeated if you keep on pretending. .So  the purpose defeated doesn’t do any good.So correct it if you can. You don’t have to make a big thing. You know, I mean you don’t have to tell of everything again, “I am not pretending but all my life is pretending” You don’t have to make a huge thing. So the purpose of achieving something is I really do not see anything better than habitually making the change. Change the negative way of thinking and way of approaching into the positive way o thinking and approaching.1:05:42.0 And when that happens, the pretending business disappears because then you are not pretending you are actually doing. That’s my feeling.Q What do you think about using transplantation of peoples’ organs? If you put in in some kind of bank that you put there for someone to use it— that its kept there for someone else to use it for transplantation? During lifetime and after?A During lifetime you’ll die. right?That is one of the best generosities if you are not selling your kidney. I’m not joking. Some people may sell it and if you sell it, you sell it. People sell a kidney I know that. But if you are selling it you are selling it.

If you don’t sell it, if you are giving it, it is generosity, the greatest.  Remember if you read the Buddha’s life story and that the tiger has been  — previous life, Jataka Stories —the cutting the wrist and letting the tiger gradually suck, and all this—that is generosity. 1:08:08.1 And especially what better gift of generosity one can do than that of actually taking part of our physicalQ After the death?R Now the death is different question to me. It depends, when do they take it. If they take it before you are really dead, my opinion when the doctors pronounce you dead, I don’t think you are dead. So when they remover your body out of the bed and they pack up all this—during this period, you mind not be dead at all 1:09:30.1 So cutting through at that period might not be the right thing to do. If you are a great bodhisattva that is able to sacrifice everything, well I have nothing to say. Except rejoice.

But if you are not, it might not be best for us. The old Tibetan system will try not to even touch the body for as long as possible. I do not know exactly why, but a number of times they say they tell you, when somebody died, don’t touch the lower part of the body and turn upper part of the body. Even those who do the phowa transformations, even the material for the phowa, they try to put on the crown rather than on the throat.1:11:16.0tr So the reason is, they say, when the consciousness leaves from the upper part of the body it somehow leads to a better life and those who are falling into the lower realms, their consciousness leaves from the lower part of the body. I don’t have reason why. That is sort of tradition says that way I don’t have any reasons why. That is what they do.

However, I do have reason to say is what really happens is all the consciousness, all of the awareness will begin to shut. All our senses will be closed. I made it very simple when I say shut. Shut does not necessarily mean shut like a door. We forget.1:12:55.0When we forget, we don’t recognize, we don’t hear it, we don’t recognize the people, we don’t recognize the words. And we can’t read lips because it’s not Bush. Its a joke. President of the United States says read my lips. But what is really happening is that the consciousnesses are sort of disconnecting with external. Disconnecting means completely forget, actually going away. So after all this external connection shut, begins to shut the internal connection 1:14:18.0Finally the awareness is fully concentrated tiny little spot within the you know end. Some kind of tiny little continuation will leave. I’m glad you raised the question because number one, not only it takes time to close them down but also when we talk about reincarnation and next life and all this, sometimes people have very funny thinking, as though we are going to change our shirt We begin to leave rather than die. No, not begin _?_ sorry. 1:15:32.0 RIght? Because I said, this life ends, next life begins. Sort of easy go, begin to plan to leave and we say we come back and pick up.

And i am sorry to disappoint you, I don’t think its like that. All our recognitions, everything we forget. Almost every consciousness even we leave it out. Extremely subtle continuation. Why do we use the word “continuation” is nothing solid, nothing substantial is left. 1:16:48.0 Something almost disconnected with ourself. We almost begin to question in that case what does my good or bad karma got to do with that. Up to that point such a solid, which up to that point, not solid, only a continuation.

The word in Tibetan is gu. You don’t really even use the human being or individual being. You use the word gu which is really continuation, subtle continuation which is going into the future. So almost total different being. I use the word almost because it is continuation of ourselves, so that is why I’m sorry to disappoint you, it’s not like going to sleep and waking up, Positively. 1:18:07.0So to reach that subtle level, to close, it’s going to take a hell of time — to close up to that subtle level, its going to take a hell of time. So you be rushed out. So that is disadvantage. Advantage is generosity. That means choice is yours. Q: Generosity? I don’t quite know. I mean, I’m quite angry someone is cutting pieces out of me at that time, If I just imagine now somebody to come along and start cutting pieces out of me I would get very angry at that time, because I am not dead yet, I could get angry and so the generosity is not so generous any more .R  I’m not sure you’d be aware of cutting it out or not. I’m not very sure, but it would definitely disturb the process of inner death. 1:20:08.7 It depends when they are really cutting. Q Are you on life support? When you die do they put you immediately on the machine because they can’t use the organs any more so they put you on life support and then they start cutting.R Is that right?Q Right because otherwise they cannot  use the organs any more.R I didn’t know thatQ Bad karma or good karma, I don’t’ want  to change my organsR I don’t think its bad karma or good karma. I don’t’ think by virtue of the action its negative or positive t1:21:06.3 Theoretically you be able to argue because it’s not giving, it’s bad That’s theoretical . Its what you call -- sort of very, very circumstantial, theoretical which is not really valid reason. So I think it’s  not non-virtuous at all  Simply not giving which might be against generosity but might not be non-virtuousBesides many of you are aware of Vajrayana practice so you know what is happening at that time so I think you can be distant too. 1:22:30.7Q How long does it take for the mind to leave the body?IR Depends I don’t think there is a blanket time limitQ I mean kind of generally in a normal person What kind of time span? Like 3 days?R maybe not that long Maybe not that long. Maybe not that long .It depends how long we will stay at the black stage. What we normally say is that some kind of drops that we have taken from the different parents will run from up down to the bottom from top to bottom and bottom up 1:23:44.1Some kind of knots will loosen and the drops be able to drop up and down whatever it is. So when you get the black you black out. That’s what it is because it comes back up and down and closes. So depends how long its stuck in there willingly or unwillingly, what ever it is willingly or unwillingly. Now I’m beginning to speak your language too So that’s why there’s no blanket time. It’s possible for a second to 52 hours or maybe more.Q On the same subject, if you work in a hospital you work with people who are dying or just died. Medically if i have to work in the hospital, what should i do? Because when you disturb someone it could be the same as murdering the person. Maybe not murdering, but disturbing and can have very bad consequences for the person who is dying. On the other hand you are obliged because in your contract, to deal with the person. Things have to be moved out. You have to move to another room. You have to start preparing him for the death, the coroner, something like that. That really bothers me because that places you in a situation where you can’t handle— if you do one thing, you disturb the person, If you don’t do it you will probably be fired. I don’t …R Question is what to do the answer is I don’t .  Just joking. You have to do what you are supposed to do You cannot sit there and argue to the doctor “he’s not dead”1:26:43.8 Right? It’s not your choice.  The decision is made by the authorized decision-maker. So you have to follow it.Q is it like saying to a soldier “kill that person”?R No. I disagree with you that it’s like murdering. I disagree with you totally. You murdered nobody Person is dying or dead So then you don’t have the negative or non-virtuous karma of killing for sure. You have no motivation of killing. You have no action of killing. You have no completion. Nothing.  But you are not doing the greatest thing to do either. That’s what it is. You have to do what you’ve got to do. You have to deal with society, you have to deal with life. Again, you have to be dharma living oriented. Deal with life, that’s what it is. I don’t think the individual is — that’s why I said I don’t think even earlier. Taking the body when the consciousness goes up and down is almost maybe a traditional saying. I am not very sure. It is an interesting point. I don’t mean interesting in a good way. I mean in a funny way but the consciousness dissolving system, that is the reality. So you don’t have to worry about removing the pins or things because you think I am touching so therefore disturbing the consciousness will go in certain direction I think just from that point. Otherwise you have to retrain all the nursesQ On the other hand, should I tell my parents for example if i am dying next time don’t touch me, let m e stay in the room?R I don’t think they will know what to do with it. Particularly if you die in the hospital they will pack you up anyway So what you do is plan to pack up a little faster Don’t take all your time. Something is funny. You don’t’ plan it but when you think you tell yourself, I’m not going to take that long, I’m going to go quickly I think it has effect The effect follows mind.Very funny So when I say plan it, you can’t make any other plan except making our mind, telling yourself, when  It starts, I’m going to start packing very fast. That’s all you can do unless you try to die in your own home and then you can tell anybody around