Archive Result

Soundfile 0000000119951209GRJHNLWE 3

Speaker Gelek Rimpoche

Location

Topic

Transcriber Xin Yan

Date 27.10.2020

Okay. So today we’re going to spend the day together. Uhm… try to find somewhere if we can help ourselves for that little bit, handling with our mind. Basically whatever I’m going to talk to you, I’m going to talk to you from the Buddhist background because that’s all I know. But without using complicated Buddhist terminology, hopefully. Ahem! As we mentioned last night whether our mind is myself or am I separate from the mind or all these let’s not bother about it.

Urhm…Its also lets’s not bother about whether I exist or I don’t exist or whatever. It is matter for the Nargajuna and the ??? (transcriber cant recognize this Tibetan term) [0:01:41.0] to sort it out. So whether we have ‘I exist’ or ‘I don’t exist’ really doesn’t matter. What does matter is in our life, what do we feel, how we work, how we function, that does matter for us, a lot. So let us pick up one little thing call mind - which you know, I know very well has no physical thing you can catch, no colour, not tangible (unclear, kindly recheck) [0:02:36.0] it’s a great you know, I can keep on talking and you can keep on translating. Its really wonderful, thank you. [0:02:42.8]

*Audience bursts into laughter*

You know if the translator is not good, its big problem. *Audience laughs*

I had an experience this trip, when I went to Singapore there’s a wonderful translator, I can keep on talking like here, the guy keep on translating in mandarin. In mandarin, the Chinese having like Cantonese, Mandarin and the Hokkien and all these in Mandarin. It’s very good. But in Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia, I had a translator which was very well known translator, very senior person, used to be very good but he had a bypass, you know heart bypass. Maybe because of that and the people keep on giggling and people starting shaking heads, shaking their heads like these. There’s some initiation so I keep on saying like millions of different jewels coming from different directions and hitting you, and he keep on translating as huge big rock coming out of the outer space. *Rimpoche laughs*

It’s a problem you know. *Rimpoche laughs*

So Hahahahahah! Thats my experience anyway. So here I can keep on talking but I don’t know what you’re saying in Dutch. Hahahaha!

So what’s happening is so the mind, what we call the mind. Whether it’s ‘self’ or whether its not ‘self’ is a different issue. Let’s not even bother about it. But we do know there’s mind. Because we function. [0:05:54.3]

I think I mentioned last night, because I sort of half jetlagged last night, I’m not sure if I did say it or not. I sorta thought I did but if that’s not mind, we’d be full of thoughts. (audio unclear, kindly recheck) [0:06:03.2 -- 0:06:07.7] I think I did say last night. *Rimpoche laughs* So we do know there’s something called mind. And you search within you, within your body inside, in the ehart, in the brain, wherever you search, you’re not gonna find it.

You know why you’re not find it? There’s 2 reasons. The first is easy reason, second is difficult reason. The easy reason is, because it has no colour, no shape, not tangible. So yet its there, we know it. So its also proves if tis there, its not necessarily we have to catch with hand, see with the eye and hear with our ear consciousness, smell with our nose or taste with our tongue and feel with our body. We don’t have to because you know that really proves our mind is there, we cannot see it, we cannot touch it, we cannot smell it, we cannot hear it we cannot feel it. So every existence is not necessarily be tangible. You know that is direct proof here. [0:08:00.1]

Now second difficult reason is the real reason of emptiness. We the Buddhist call it emptiness or wisdom. Let’s not worry about it. It’s not subject today anyway. Okay. So that very mind or what we call that insight, that is what we call it principle mind. So all other emotions such as anger, ??(don’t get this word) [0:09:22.4] or enthusiasm, enthusiastic feeling (I shouldn’t say enthusiasm) enthusiastic feelings and all of those, all of those emotional stuff, good and bad, we call that mental faculty. The principle mind is very passive. And the mental faculty side is very active. So the principle mind very passive mind is very neutral mind. The active mental faculties are more than neutral so it will make a lot of difference. I very often give the example here. Urhmm, the principle mind looks like a clean, clear crystal lampshade. The active mental faculties are like light bulb inside. [0:11:26.1]

And some are red, like anger let’s say its red light bulb. And attachment is cool, blue, green light bulb. So whenever those things come up, the light comes up, it changes colour of lampshade. And when the red bulb’s on, you call it red light. *Rimpoche laughs* And when its green light comes up, you see green light, you can go. Ya. So that’s exactly how the active and the passive mind functions. And that’s the reason why we say right from the beginning as every human being has wonderful quality within you. It’s because that passive mind has no problem in its own nature at all. But those mental faculties made lot of difference. So the anger made it looks like very fearful red. And the so, this is exactly where we are. This is our situation. Do you agree? Or you have a problem with that? If you have a problem, it’s the time for you to mention. If you don’t, we’ll go along with that. So no hands seen. So let’s presume no problem. I’m not joking. It’s true. *Rimpoche laughs* [0:14:20.6]

So now, in order to make that work, all different religions and all different people come in there to try to make the difference. And Buddhism happens to be one of them too. So what Buddha does, what Buddha says is Buddha said “I will share my experience, on the basis how exactly how I felt and how I handle the problem”. Okay. The problem what I mentioned earlier, the situation what I mentioned earlier. The mental faculty is creating problem to the mind and you dealing with people. This is common to everybody. Religion or no religion, Buddhism or no Buddhism. It is common for everybody. I really want to make that clear to you. So all the religions, all of those are focused to try to relieve the negative emotions affecting the mind. Some uses faith, some uses reasoning, some makes you analyze. That’s what it is. Right or wrong? Some will simply as go to church and pray to the God, some will simply say ‘go to the ???? (word unclear) [0:16:53.3] and pray to God and some will say meditate, some will say think and analyze. And then the therapist come in too. *Audience chuckles* Ya, they try to, ya, true, true. And they try to help you analyze together. [0:17:25.1] Same thing. One end to try to make life live easier. Is that right or wrong?

Audience: why do some religions make sure of fear?

Rimpoche: Use for what?

Audience: well, that is her question. Why do some religions like Catholicism (please recheck if this is the exact word Rimpoche meant/said) [0:18:22.0] make use of fear. Why do they make people afraid?

Rimpoche: They try to. You know a lot of those religion do use fear and try to tell them if you don’t do this, you go to hell, they do that. They do this not if you really look deep inside, its not that they wanted to cheat people. It’s not that they want to frighten people. But they applying all the method, all the method in the sense to make people better. And they don’t want them do something. If they cannot explaining properly, just say “God won’t like it, you go to hell”. So it’s an old style method. To me, it’s nothing bad they did, it’s not going to work very well today whether its Catholicism?? [0:19:26.6] or Buddhism, Hinduism, whoever try to tell you “You don’t do good, you go to hell.” A lot of them do. Urhm, very well, I might as well go down hell and experience little bit. *Rimpoche laughs* you may have to say that!

The point really is, the point really is you know the point really is, a period. Lets looks 200 years before. 100 or 200 years before. The period. People are not so educated as they are today. People’s minds are not so sophiscated as we are today. And there are lot of intelligent and wonderfully educated people at that time are there?? (unclear) [0:21:20.0] but when they try to explain to you, to these people who are uneducated, lot of them. It is very difficult to explain and communicate. [0:21:34.8]

So then what they do, what they do and they draw a simplicity. Say what “if you do good, you going to be good. You do bad, you going to be bad.” So then another question rises. What good, what bad? So then they bring the most extreme example of bad, saying you go to hell. And they bringing extreme good example of good and you go to the right site. *Audience chuckles* My feeling, I have no idea, I have no at all idea of Christian background at all. My feeling is that’s how it been gradually developed to make simple explanation with good mind, good intention then its become one repeats to the other, one repeats to the other and basically you simply tell “you go to hell, you go to hell, you go to hell” I think that might have come up that way. You know why? You know why I think that way? Its happened to the Tibetan Buddhism same thing. We don’t tell them go to hell but, not go to hell but *Rimpoche nad audience laughs* but what happened is when you try to explain certain points, and when you have the lack of communication and then you make it as short as possible and then you shape it in that manner. That’s with my personal experience. I’m guessing that might have happened. [0:24:22.7]

And not only that, and whatever it may be, you use something and it will prevent people doing something wrong, you will feel in any case, you have helped them. So that must be the reasons why they use fear. That’s my guess. But to these people, people like you who are very well educated, all of you and truly speaking I’ the most uneducated person here. In terms of western education. *Rimpoche and audience bursts into laughter* so anyway, its not going to buy, whether you going to say you’re going to hell or you say you’re going to do whatever it is. No, no, no. Whatever it is, you’re not going to buy. Because of our capacity, mental capacity, mind training, education is one of the mind trainings. You know that, right? Educated person and uneducated person you put them together, you see it, right? So the educated person is mind trained, there is a training in the mind. So you can analyze, you just don’t buy the blind faith or whatever it is. So…..so I think that’s the only problem, I don’t think the religion as a tradition, I don’t think there’s a problem. Well, there is Catholicism?? [0:27:01.9] or Judiasm, or whatever it is, I don’t think it’s a problem in the nature of the religion, it is the problem for the people who are presenting the ideas of the religion. I think that’s where it went wrong. [0:27:31.7]

Even in the terms of the mystical, even in the terms of the mystical things, you know the Judiac-Christian background has a tremendous amount of rich mystical practice. And what happened to them now today? But because of certain teachers or preachers are unable to explain it, so its easy for them to ????? [0:28:13.6] and say “not exist”. *Rimpoche laughs* so it is the same thing. The Tibetan Buddhism carries a lot of mysticism, a lot of mysticism too. And so does the Christian tradition too. But fortunately Tibetans have it and the Christian traditions is lost. And that’s why we say “we keep the products in life”. ??? (kindly recheck) [ 0:29:08.9] and the Judiac-Christian tradition is gone out of life and almost become as urhmmm a weekly activity in church or something you know. So because that’s the same thing, because of the capacity of the individual that make difference.

Anyway I’m talking nonsense. Its not even my subject so lets get back to ……? [0:29:47.0] *Rimpoche laughs and clears throat* The subject is mind. Get that on mind. So fear is one of those. You know, one of those. One of the powerful mental faculty. Actually I’m glad you raised that question. We know very well about anger but fear is another one we don’t deal very much. Fear is another one to make ourself very much, put us on duty to work for Queen Ant. [0:30:36.0]

You know why? Truly you are not very sure. We are not very sure. Truly! Am I really going to go to hell? Or what’s going happen? You don’t like to buy that and you are not very sure about it so you worry. And this is how fear works. *Rimpoche clears throat* So it becomes the weak point of the individual. So anybody play with that its become advantage. That’s exactly how I look at the fear. Do you disagree? Exactly is fear does this. We are not very sure, we like to deny but we are not really 100% sure so you pull and push. That’s what fear does. It is problem of mental faculty, one of the mental faculty. Big problem mental faculty. You cannot say “don’t be afraid”. You know some people like to deny the fear - “I’m not afraid”. And then you walk in *Rimpoche chuckles*, you say I’m not afraid and you walk in Zurich airport. *Audience laughs*, *Rimpoche laughs* and you get robbed or you say “I’m not afraid”, you try to walk in Harlem, New York. And you get into problem. And so all the fears are not necessarily that bad either. [0:33:30.0]

If you have little fear, you be little more careful. That’s how religions master use fear for that way. Anyway, what does fear really do to us? And for us we go beyond carefulness. ??? [0:34:06.0] And its becomes worrisome. And its go beyond making the person careful, it makes more problem to the individual. *Rimpoche clears throat* and that is the problem of fear. And how do we handle it? It is very very funny. Its really funny but you have to handle it in certain level to be able to have enough red light to show you warning and don’t go beyond that. Are you with me? But this is important. You cannot deny fear completely. If you do so you crazy. Fear should work like red light. And when you go and drive you see the red light, you stop, you think. Right? I don’t know whether you think or not, but you stop. *Rimpoche laughs* Urhmm so fear should be able to do that to you. and that is the purpose of fear, finish! And if you have the red light all the time, then you can’t go. You have to sit there whole time! So that is the overusage of fear. The red light never turns into yellow or green. This is our problem. [0:36:23.8]

You know where is that problem coming from? Laziness. Absolutely true! Because we don’t want to be active and change our thoughts in our functioning. We sort of submit ourself to certain emotions let it take at. So you don’t know where to put fullstop. So this is problem. Right or wrong? Leah Maria? Says yes (to recheck if Leah maria spelling is correct as Rimpoche called out her name here) [0:37:08.8] *Audience chuckles* I was thinking you should be this side, I was looking there but didn’t see you. Anyway, so.

Translator to Rimpoche: Please continue

Rimpoche to translator: You’ve translated already?

Translator: You want me to translate….

Rimpoche: No No No, not that.

*Rimpoche and audience bursts into laughter*

So there are certain mental faculties such as fear, there is need of that to certain level but it should not go beyond that. Urhm there are certain mental faculties such as anger, you don’t it at all. So to know that, what is need of mental faculty, what is not need of mental faculty, you need a little bit of learning. So Buddha emphasized first step, is learning. The learning is not make you become a scholar, you become scholar, great. But it is not necessary, not absolutely necessary. But enough knowledge for you to figure out what is all about it. [0:39:12.4]

For example like fear, how much you can use, how much you can stop. This is the learning. Like anger, you don’t need at all. That’s learning. But people will tell you differently too. Some will tell you anger is necessary, says if you don’t have anger, you are a wimp. Urhm some will tell you if you don’t have anger, you don’t have a force. And that’s not true. Looks like true but it’s not true. Right? I don’t consider Ghandhi a wimp. So that’s example. The non-violence is very powerful force. Its not anger. When we get angry, we scream, hit the ceiling then we fall down. *Audience laughs* So what do you do that for? But instead of that, if you have compassion and the caring, caring. The caring is the most important. Its give you all the strength you need. Look at mothers. How much the mothers take care of their baby when they have one or two or three together. *Rimpoche laughs* How much they take care of their small babies, when they get older like ten or eleven then they fight. So that’s different issue. When they are small, how much they can take care of? [0:42:17.4]

You may be absolutely tired, you’re not going to move at all. However when the baby screams, you noticed you are already up. And that is the strength, and that is the force. Its only given by the love and the care of the children. You’re not gonna hit the ceiling nor you’re not going to bump down. Right? Where its coming from? The love and the care. Anger does other way. So that’s why if you can replace the anger by love and care, and the Buddha found that its much more effective. And much more powerful. So that’s why Buddha even could extend and go and says “look everybody as mother beings or something.” And when other beings, I don’t think Buddha meant when you look at your mother. If you look at your mother, you would get more angry. *Audience laughs* But you look from the mother’s window. I’ve never been mother so I don’t know. But many of you been mother so you know. So when I watch the mothers, how they drew and how they take care of their children, how they take care of their cats, then I can see it how the mothers care for the children. Really works. [0:45:55.0]

So…both, you know I’m going to tell you something very funny. I don’t know whether it’s going to work or not. But let’s try. Both mothers taking care of children and working with your companion, it is the same feeling you have. You have the care, you have the feeling of correcting, making it right. So for children, you have understanding. No matter how the child will show you tantrum the mother doesn’t matter how much tantrum they show you, mother will tolerate because you have unlimited understanding for children who……(recording distrupted at this point, no audible sound) [0:46:30.2 -- 0:46:39.5] Because simple idea inside you tells you it is children. But if you use the same method for the companion, and the person will reply you back. So then anger comes up. And then because you don’t have the unlimited understanding, anger comes up. You quarrel with that. See the difference now? Same motivation, same method. However when the children throw fists, and you think ‘ah its children’. There’s understanding. When grown up throw you fists back, maybe not even throw but to some extend, you will definitely react different. Why? [0:48:10.4]

The expectation. You expect more! And then there’s disappointment. Of whatever you are expecting. You are not getting it. So then you get hurt. Then you get all other problems. You…anyway??? (audio unclear ) [0:48:34.9 to 0:48:41.4] Your face grows longer. All of those expectations, lack of understanding, right? So I told you last night it is problem depends on how you perceive. You know the Bodhisattvas, they call it City of Joy because no matter whatever happens, they enjoy. It’s not that Bodhisattvas free of problems but they also get joy out of the problem. And that’s why it’s called City of Joy. That’s how individual perceives. And you and I could do that same thing very easily. If we have a little better understanding or each other. Can you see it now? It is very very ground, ??? (didn’t catch this word) [0:50:13.7] open on your table. Ya, thankyou. At least you are acknowledging. *Rimpoche laughs* Its really true. So if you can do the same feelings, same understanding that tolerance which you can show to your children to the others. Problem are much less. But you cannot take it because the Queen Ant doesn’t like it. Queen Ant thinks that ‘oh somebody’s looking down on me. Somebody’s making use of me as doormat.’ [0:51:29.1]

Nobody is making you doormat. But your mind will tell you that much. So you perceive that much. So you say “haih. Too much I cant take it anymore!!” So that’s how mind works. So sit down and meditate, analyze. Study your mind how it functions. Take note. How your anger rises. Take note how your fear rise. And then observe it. Compare your note and how the anger comes up. And almost the same way you took note, it will function in that manner. When that’s happening, you begin to understand the functioning of the mental faculty called anger or fear, how it works with you. So when you have the understanding, then you can deal with it. So that’s what I call it working with anger, working with fear. That’s what I call learning, too. Not that bad experience. Lot of people will have lot of bad experience and then you say “but it is good learning” and you repeat the same thing again, and then you say good learning. And you go on repeating till you die and keep on saying good learning. I don’t see much value in that learning. [0:54:31.2]

So the learning is when you learn, you don’t have to repeat. So what do you do? Analyze? Think about it? Meditate? And when you begin to get that, then you take action. What action? If possible, change the anger into compassion, if you can. Or change into love, if you can. If you cannot, neutralize. Neutralize, turn down and neutralize. Does that make sense to you? Any problems?

Rimpoche: She says no problem. Yes, that lady over there. She has problem. No, you don’t have problem but go ahead.

Audience: Well, she thinks just as you are born with love for your children so you are born with anger. So that is very natural thing for a human thing you have.

Rimpoche: I did not say its not nature. It is nature, sure. Caring is nature, anger is nature but nature is not permanent, it is impermanent. Since it is impermanent, you can change it. [0:57:29.8]

Audience: so you have to change your human nature?

Rimpoche: Well, human nature is habitual pattern. Changing of that is the essence of spiritual practice. And there are lot of people who try to tell you and say “its human nature. Forget about it” we even use that very often for talking to each other but human nature is human nature. It is changeable. The good nature you have to keep it, bad natures you have to change. What’s wrong with that? Now one thing, that maybe people think God made in that manner so we cannot change it. But I learnt. Maybe it is because of I am 80 years but whatever it is. You know its not that really the natures can definitely change. The bad person can become a good person and vice versa, the good person can become bad person too. We all know that all the time and that’s how you change in nature without putting efforts, that’s how people do. So with effort we can make better change. So human nature is something which not only you can change, but you should change. [1:00:08.2]

Otherwise where is the spiritual development? And all these religion traditions try to tell you be good , be good, be good, be good. Its also try to tell you, change! Without changing, how can you be good? Without changing, how you can be bad? So change is necessary. And it will be there. Even you try not to change, it will change. You cannot go hold sun and hold it back. You cannot hold time. The human nature changes same way. Problem with that? Ya. Its something to change. Do not expect something change today, okay? That is another thing. If you have a lot of expectation, someone to change today, you going to be disappointed in the evening.

I better not have you disappointed because you’ll be demanding your money to be returned from me. *Rimpoche laughs* That’s joke. *Audience laughs* the main thing is not to have expectation. Whatever you do, you can try and apply and it works. Appreciate it better and don’t have big expectation. Expectation becomes disappointment. We talked that just now anyway. That is with everything, with the companionship with the friendship, with the practice, with the meditation, with the mantra, with the therapist, everything! With medication. You cannot forget the doctors. So if you work that way, its works better. [1:03:08.8]

What I’m trying to share you is the technique how to handle your mind. It’s not my technique, its Buddha’s technique. And Buddha used this way, Buddha might not have talked like the way we are talking, Buddha might have talked in different language, different style, but bottom line message is this. Great. So only way how you handle these emotions is where it rises, how it functions and observing it. Okay. Now where and how you observe sometimes bring you a problem. I should raise that too. Okay. How you get the problem if you do not know where you to stop? (please recheck this part) [1:04:47.5] and how you can function. Then you get problem. Because instead of stop where you supposed to stop, you go unlimitedly tressing it? (please recheck) [1:05:06.5] so then you get into problem. But on the other hand, if you simply follow the thought, without giving any judgement, how do I get irritated, where my mind’s going to go? So if you let it follow it, you know, if you follow it, it cannot go very far. It will come back. [1:06:01.2]

Really true. If you are carrying a bird in a ship in the middle of ocean somewhere, and then you let the bird go. Let it fly so it will go very high, whatever they could, right? And how far they will go? There’s no other place to land. I mean now that there’s lots of ships but if let say there’s only one ship, you know. So they cannot land anywhere else. So what they have to do is they have to come back. So likewise, if you let your mind fly, and you follow it, and ultimately it will land back. So if you keep on recognizing that, it makes mind life much easier for you. So now you know these mental faculties have its own limitations. And you know they cannot go that far. That is important, actually. But instead of that, instead of following that, if you take it personally, then the personalization is giving them the support. Instead of running out of gas, you refilling them. You know what I mean personalizing? Personalizing is ‘oh, how can I take it’, ‘it is terrible for me’, ‘how I’m going to manage?’, ‘what I’m going to do?’, ‘oh I’m going to be doormats of everybody’, ‘everybody will look me down’, ‘I must stand against’, ‘I must do this’. That is I, I, I, I – million of I. It is personalizing, that is call personalizing those mental faculties. [1:09:05.4]

That’s what it is. The moment you personalize, you refill the gas. And instead of getting back, it can take more time. So it is important to recognize this is negative emotion. And by recognizing, you don’t feed them. Any problems?

Rimpoche: Yeah?

Audience: if you use the example, you’ve given before about this bird who flies away from the ship, that you mean if you personalize it, then you hold the bird, instead of following it?

Rimpoche: Instead of making the bird get tired, have to come back. So you refill the little more gas so it will go little farther. You know why the bird has to land back on the ship? Because it has no other place to land. It has exhausted its energy completely so comes back to it. Right? So if you give them little more gas, it gives them little more time to fly. So you give more gas, it flies more. That’s how we feed the negative emotions. Okay? The essence of the dharma, the essence of dharma is to cut down the negative emotions. The aim of the dharma is to make the individual better. If possible. Absolutely perfect. If not possible, a middle level. If that’s not possible, then make better. [1:12:33.2]

This is what we called it as essence of dharma. Really what it is. We have technical name we call …??? (didn’t catch this phrase) [1:12:46.0] this and that, 3 different stages with development and all. These are technicality but really what’s happening is that. And the way and how you do is exactly by observing. Knowing it. And if you do not know how the negative emotions are functioning, you have no knowledge of enemy. No matter you try to improve yourself, you simply shooting the arrows in blind. You know, without target. You just throwing arrows in the forest. And if you know how the negative emotions are functioning with you, you have a target. So either you throw arrows and destroy it, or you get hold of it and peel it, peel the skins off like the orange. If you find pieces of orange, you peel the skin, right? Because you don’t want to eat with the skin, you want to peel the skin, you want to eat the orange inside. Here the same thing. You want relish and the cherish, the good nature of the person so what you have is the negative emotions, you have to peel them off. And if you don’t know what to peel it off, its then you peel off everything together, you’re left with nothing. Right? If you give a piece of apple to bear, what the bear going to do? Either eat with the skin or peel it off every single thing. So we do differently. Because the knowledge. And the understanding. So we should do with our emotions the same thing. (inaudible / audio distrupted) [1:15:56.5 to 1:16:14.1] [1:16:14.1]

I think we have said enough on that. You know I can go on talking but I’m not sure if there is of any more purpose or not. So if you have any questions, we’ll be able to, happy to discuss something. Because if I keep on talking that, maybe I’m afraid if it’ll be too much. It doesn’t really work very well. You know the thing is …if we have a…its okay it doesn’t matter. (Rimpoche aborted the attempt to say/explain further)

Rimpoche: Yes?

Audience: Someone from the audience asked a question inaudible in recording, audible part is in Dutch which the transcriber cannot understand [starting from 1:17:06.6 to 1:17:36.2]

Rimpoche: Do you know blaming other is personal, personalizing by yourself? The reason why you blame the others - to save your face. We normally do that, we would see ourself as faultless. If so and so has not done that, I would not have this problem. Bla bla bla. So we feel that all the time. We get that all the time. You know why? You don’t want yourself to be the target. And that is very much personalization. And sometimes, when you cannot blame anybody else, then you blame yourself. And blame so much so that you become miserable. This is the Queen Ant torturing yourself. [1:19:10.7]

So the solution for that is let it go. The past is past. Only use in that is learning lessons. You cannot go back on time. So let it go. Oh, this is very important. Let it be, don’t really have to if you don’t want to, don’t really have to take the blame. Whoever fault is, it’s gone. Doesn’t matter. Its your fault or my fault or his fault or her fault, let it go. You know why? Shantideva, one of the great Buddhist teacher Indian says, (Rimpoche said a phrase in Tibetan, Ke Shi Tsu…??) [1:20:15.7 to 1:20:22.6] If there is something to be corrected, why you have to remain unhappy? Just correct it. If there is nothing to be corrected, why you remain unhappy? You can do nothing. Let it go.

This is definitely very important solution. And very relevant in today. Make us a lot more happier. If not happier, but not so much sad anyway. Because the blaming is then another counter reaction you invite. You know that very well, right? The other will not take the blame! They put the whole blame on you! Anyway, that is the game between mothers and daughters play anyway. And you know what Buddhist teachings will tell you here (Rimpoche said a phrase in Tibetan, Le Le...?) [1:22:14.8 to 1:22:18.8] the Buddhist teachings will tell you, particularly in the Lojongs or the Training of Minds, they will tell you ‘Take all the problems one. And that is the Queen Ant’ [1:22:36.4]

It is true. Because if there is no dictation from Queen Ant, you’re not going to get in that trouble at all. Somebody might have done something. But you have contributed. Definitely. How can you make a clap with one hand? Never work. Never work! Its always will contribute and then you make noise. So it is the Queen Ant. That’s what Buddha does. That’s how Buddha transfer to disciples in that way? (please recheck this sentence) [1:23:42.3] so the real source of trouble is the Queen Ant. Not you, again. Not you! You are just a simple individual who try to make good living, not that you. The ambitious, proud Queen Ant inside you is the problem. Okay? Or not okay? *Rimpoche laughs*

Rimpoche: Huh? Any other questions? Yes?

Audience: (someone asked a question but inaudible) [1:24:47.8 to 1:25:40.3]

Rimpoche: To me, the reincarnation is real. Its not a belief. Where I used the word last night, is the way where how this language you speak. We speak this language. You don’t say ‘in the world of reincarnation’, you simply say in the society where you believe. Right? You don’t want say ‘in the world of reincarnation’ things are different and then you salvage that world, right? (unclear) [1:26:13.1] So that’s exactly what it is, but reincarnation to me is reality. To you, it may be big question. To some people, it will be absolutely deniable. The very fact you call me Rimpoche, if I’ve not reincarnated, I lose my title even. *Audience laughs* [1:27:34.9]

So don’t make its only belief. *Rimpoche laughs* I think they all joke. But reality is, reality is there are lot of instances in the human life and there are lot of younger human being, young human beings will try to function differently and only, just only night before yesterday I was in Delhi and I was giving a dinner to family that I know for quite a while. The woman had a big experience of sort of return from death. I’m not talking about death, what I’m talking about they had a little grandchild. So that grandchild, the grandmother really strongly thinks the grandchild is her husband. You know the reason? When the grandchild started speaking first, and he addresses her, instead of calling ‘Grandma’, he address her ‘Vijay’ where he used to call her ‘Vijay’. And the child is now bout 4 years, 4 or 5 doesn’t matter that much. And with the great difficulty, he changed to call ‘Grandma’. Used to call ‘Vijay’ only. That’s how he used to call her. Nobody in that family calls her ‘Vijay’ except the husband who died and that little kid. [1:30:14.3]

And that little kid also call his own father, ‘father’ instead of calling ‘father’, he calls ‘Annu’. ‘Annu’ is his father used to call him ‘Annu’, so he started calling him ‘Annu’ this and that. You know that little baby calling ‘Annu’ and they all started saying “who taught you call me Annu?” And then the child loses, he say great difficulty to change that to call him ‘daddy’. You know this is sort of funny little thing. Now the most important thing on this story, there was a man who is the business partner of this woman. This old lady. The grandmother’s business partner. Her late husband never used to like this guy, never like, sort of jealous, suspicious whatever it is. Who knows the reason. So anyway, not happy with it. And this little kid has done so many times, very often whenever this fellow rings up, he picks the telephone and says wrong number. *Audience bursts into laughter* (recording ended abruptly at 1:32:47.6)