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19970830GRSRLR15

0:00:13.2 wonderful it is to be able to function as an illusion body.

Having all these different samadhis: hero-like samadhi, vajra-like samadhi, all of those; just even hearing about them alone, how wonderful it is!

And, of course, how wonderful is such a path that Tsongkhapa experienced and shared, a quick path which delivers enlightenment in our own hands. How wonderful it is!

It is necessary for us to learn, but it is not necessary for us to learn in very great detail. No matter whatever it is, short or long, we pick up the essence of the Lamrim which is the experience of the Buddha emphasized by Atisha, and further developed by Tsongkhapa, and we learn, think, and practice. We are getting the essence message of the Buddha, we are getting the essence message of Atisha, and of Tsongkhapa. It is the

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actual word of Manjushri. It is the blood of the heart of the dakinis. How wonderful that we found this!

Pabongka counted there twenty-two wonderfulnesses, happinesses. It looks like we all have these at this moment. We are half-way through. We did not go through the stages of the Vajrayana in the manner that we went through the Lamrim here, but one day may be able to do it.

2.25 I guess lam rim is over as far as giving the information is concerned (not in book). When I did first lam rim teachings here, we taught very detailedly and it took 8, 9 years.

0:02:23.0 Even those 8 years we have been doing lam rim and we did those weekends when people drove in from Chicago, Cleveland and different areas, flew in from California, some flew in from New York.

I am still not sure whether you have them completely together. So I wanted to have something completely together that you can take into your hand, slightly away from the traditional way. That inspired me to do this, because we started losing Lex and Allen and Gelongla. When people put in so much energy and tried to do something I thought there must me something simple, solid. You need to have it. For those who have the detailed information you have now been provided with a container where you can fit everything together overnight, like a briefcase or bag.

0:04:20.4 For those who have not been able to spend time you have been provided with a basis on which you can function and you can pick up information here and there and add up. You need more information than what you got, because you need to convince your mind to change your neurotic habits. In order to do that you have to convince your mind and in order to do that you need more true reasons. You cannot argue with your mind, saying, “You got to believe it! If you don’t, I am going to do it anyway!” That doesn’t work. It may work for one minute and make you quiet.

0:05:05.9 The mind may keep quiet for one minute, but next it says, " Wait, wait a minute!" so it doesn't work. The mind is wonderful in nature, it is open-minded, you can suggest anything. Sometimes we say the mind is like a color-free crystal lampshade, and the suggestions, mental neuroses and positiveness, are like the bulb. These positive suggestions and negative suggestions influence the mind. They pop out and then your mind looks red, green, blue, whatever the color of the bulb that you have. That's how it functions.

1001987-1991.

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In order to have your point accepted by your mind, you need very true reasoning. True because your mind knows more than you. If it is a false reason you are giving, the mind won't buy it. The true reason you give, your mind will buy. It's an open mind. Once the mind buys that, then you begin to function according to that. That is the changing of the neurotic functioning into the positive way; that's how it works.

If you give one suggestion a single time, and you start looking to see if it is working, it won't work. You have to keep on giving the suggestion constantly; have patience. Constantly put forth the effort of the fourth paramita, enthusiasm, along with the third paramita, patience, along with the second paramita, keeping your commitment, along with the first paramita, being generous, along with concentration, along with wisdom. Each one of the points of the Odyssey to Freedom, if we apply them on ourselves combined with the six paramitas, then the mind will accept them. It needs repetition; pounding, repounding, pounding, repounding. If you keep on hitting the nails in there, it will go through.

Questions from the afternoon discussion groups

Audience: Would you define clearly what refuge is and what effect taking refuge has at the time of death.

Rinpoche: To me, taking refuge in Buddha, Dharma and Sangha is, a) I see the Buddha, Dharma and Sangha have the qualities to help me; b) I see I need help. I put the two of them together and I seek protection. I say, " Would you be my object of refuge? Would you take care of me? I am going to rely on you so would you help me?" It is so wonderful to find an object of refuge who has personal experience of the sufferings that we go through, somebody who is in touch with reality, some-

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body who went out of the sufferings and found a different position. It is really rare to find such an object of refuge.

Refuge to me is simply relying on how they guide you on the path. I don't think by taking refuge you get protected from a car crash or plane crash — maybe it'll help a little bit, but that's not the purpose; that's not the point. Nor by taking refuge does your business improve; nor do you get a promotion, or a pay increase; I don't think that is the point. The point really is, by trusting that refuge, you'll be able to make yourself a good person, to have goodness in nature, to develop into a perfect being. Taking refuge is building that connection. It is not surrender; nor is it simply putting trust in something; it is a point that you establish.

At the time of death, does it help? Positively, it does. Because if you think of Buddha and die, you're guaranteed, according to Buddhism, not to take a horrible rebirth as your immediate next one. That's why in the Tibetan tradition, when people die, they bring an image or a thangka of Buddha. That's why people read books, say prayers, all because of the dharma being present, being connected at the time of death. So it does definitely help. No question. And, in this life, it helps you be a good person. When you try to become a bad person, your refuge will remind you, "Oh oh, can I really do that?" That's how it helps you. Materially even.

There are a number of people who have requested to receive the refuge vows. At the end of the retreat we would like to have the White Tara longevity initiation for everybody. Because you've been doing Tara practice for the whole week and I am sure a lot of you are doing it continuously, I would like to do that. In that, as part of that process, you have refuge taking, you have generating bodhimind, all of them there, so we can do that together at that time.

0:15:34.6: Audience: you said all created phenomena are impermanent. What is an uncreated phenomenon? Does it mean enlightenment? Is enlightenment permanent?

Rimpoche: Enlightenment is permanent, and space is permanent. Buddha is permanent. Human being is permanent, but an individual human being is impermanent, individual buddhas are impermanent. Space is permanent. It doesn’t change. It is there all the time.

Audience: A question about karma. Does purification affect karma directly or does it simply change the conditions? Rinpoche: Both. Purification weakens the karma and changes the conditions. That's why when it is purified, it doesn't materialize.

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Day Six Step31 -49

Audience: What is the relationship of the Buddhas to karma? Did they participate in it? Did they set it up?

Rinpoche: Yes. They participated [in it, are subject to it]. And how you become a Buddha: you cut down all your negative karmas and you gain a tremendous number of positive karmas; finally you clear all your negative karmas, including their imprints. That, then, is called the awakened state, since you only have positive karma left. Some people say Buddhas have no karmas. I disagree with that. Buddhas have all positive karmas. If Buddhas don't have karmas, why did they work earlier? The earlier working was accumulating positive karma. By building positive karma, negative karma is reduced and finally you are left with only positive karma. That's called enlightenment state. That's called awakened mind. That's called enjoyment body, all these. That, I believe, is how it does work.

Audience: Could you explain what collective karma is?

Rinpoche: Collective karma is something people create together. There is a story here. During the Buddha's lifetime thirty-two children of one family were killed, their heads were put in a little box and delivered to the mother. She freaked out completely, went to Buddha to seek help. In the process of the conversation she said, " What kind of karma did I create to have this happen to me?" And the Buddha told the story. "A long time ago you were running a guest-house, where thirty-two thieves used to stay. They went out and stole some neighbor's cow and you enjoyed the cow's meat and things like that together. Your thirty-two children happen to be the former thirty-two thieves and you were the landlady." That is an example of collective karma.

We create lots of collective karmas together. Like here in Jewel Heart: Jewel Heart carrying on its activities, such as supporting the handicapped children in Tibet, feeding fifty of them every day in Lhasa.

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And we tried to set up a village school in Kongpo area90, we are supporting twenty-two village schools91, and also we are building an image of the Buddha, an image of Tsongkhapa, an image of Guru Padmasambhava and an image of Demo Rinpoche, my late father, all of them in the Kongpo region in Demo monastery. All of these, all money and efforts that you put in, we are building up in common, creating positive common karmas.

At the same time, we also pay our taxes to Uncle Sam. When your tax dollars are being utilized for truly benefiting individuals, or the country, or society or groups of people, particularly within our own society, helping the homeless, building better roads, how wonderful it is. It is the creation of common positive karmas. It also goes in the opposite direction; when our resources are used for destruction or building bombers and bombs, we are also building a common negative karma. How can we protect ourselves from that? One great quality of being in the United States is that each and every one of us can make a difference. If you speak to your representative in the House [of Representatives], or to your senator; if you can bark enough, it does make a difference. That's how you can protect your common karma. You've got to pay your taxes, otherwise they will catch you, lock you up; you don't want that. But you definitely can say it, and do and undo the money that you pay to the government. At least you can voice your opinion. And if enough voices come, they have to listen because they have to come back and get your vote. That's probably the way that you can help.

90 Kongpo is the region in southeastern Tibet where Gelek Rinpoche's father's monastery was located, and is a poor rural area where children have little or no access to schools.

91 The Namling County Schools Project, which builds schools in remote, underserved areas of Namling County, Shigatse Prefecture, Tibet. The schools teach village children Tibetan language and basic mathematics, and open the door to government schools and higher education. The Project aims to promote literacy, preserve the Tibetan language and culture, and enable Tibetans to compete and survive in greater China. Information to be found on the Jewel Heart website: jewelheart.org/humanitarian.html

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Day Six: Step 31-49

Audience: You have described a very negative experience of the bardo. Is it possible to have a positive experience? Are there picnic spots you can recommend? And could one get enlightened in the bardo?

Rinpoche: Yes, all three, yes. You can have a wonderful bardo, completely joyful and easy. And even if it is all joy and easy, of course you have bardo symptoms there. And definitely you can obtain enlightenment at the bardo level. Tsongkhapa obtained his enlightenment at the bardo level, not during his lifetime.

In the period of about two hundred years between Guru Padmasambhava and Atisha and during another two to three hundred years

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between Atisha and Tsongkhapa; during that period Vajrayana developed very much, and sometimes the behavior of the crazy wisdom overpowered the rules of celibacy. By the time Tsongkhapa lived, celibacy was almost completely ignored in Tibet. So Tsongkhapa took it as a mission for himself to emphasize celibacy; he made it a very strong rule. At the time when Tsongkhapa himself was about to become enlightened, Tsongkhapa hinted to Khedrup Je, one of his disciples, that this was the time for him to collect and maintain all the air and energy within the central channel. Khedrup Je took the message straight-away and immediately he got up and kept on making prostrations and said, " Please don't do that until you die". It requires a sexual union; that is really true crazy wisdom. That's why Tsongkhapa obtained enlightenment at the bardo level.

Actually, during the period of death, the level of your consciousness is reduced to subtlety and clarity. This also occurs in the great sexual union experience, not ordinary sex that we have; when the real true sexual energy melts from your crown down to the lowest level of the body, re-routes through and reverses it. It is that level that it is needed to maintain all energies in the central channel. So the choice is, either at the death period; or this extraordinary, this unthinkable, unimaginable wonderful sexual experience. Definitely Tsongkhapa obtained enlightenment at the bardo level. Even a praise tells you, "You have obtained ultimate siddhihood at the bardo level 68 So it is definitely possible.

Audience: Is there a benefit to working with ourselves to try to accept reincarnation completely, rather than just be satisfied with Allen's view which you expressed as giving the benefit of the doubt, saying, " I'm not sure but I want to give myself the opportunity" ?

68'Song of the Tricosmic Master' [Tib. Pelden sa sum ma] by Khedrup Je. To be found in Robert Thurman, Life and Teachings of Tsongkhapa, pg 236. This translation says: "Mind focused on the clear light of Dharmakaya, / Your body transformed into a luminous sphere and, / In the bardo, illusory body yoga fulfilled Sambhogakaya / To you who gained supreme siddhi / I offer my spiritual aspirations."

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Day Five: step 20-30 187

Rinpoche: That is an opening. Don't force, work hard and say, hey you've got to accept reincarnation because you are Buddhist. That doesn't work. When you understand, you understand. When you don't understand, you don't understand; you give it the benefit of the doubt. That benefit of the doubt may enable you to understand. If you do, accept it at that time, don't force. You don't have to push it. You don't ever have try to believe it without really seeing it nicely. That is very important. Just don't reject, and don't yet accept; give it the benefit of the doubt. See from there where you can go.

0:30:45.6 Audience: Is there anything you are willing to share about organ donation.

Rinpoche: Well, if you are a bodhisattva, go ahead. Make the organ donation. But then, you should remember you have to go quickly when you go. You don't linger around; that would be a big problem.

Apart from that, you have to think a little carefully. It depends. Most probably if you are going to die in the hospital, then you really don't have much time to stay there, and if your organs are useful to somebody else, why not. Not only why not, if it is of great use for somebody else, it is a wonderful thing. But if you think you would have time to go slowly [through the death process], then organ donations are a big problem, because, in the traditional Tibetan system, we try not to touch the body at all. A little touch here and there may disrupt the process and make people go, make the consciousness to go out [through the wrong door]. That's the reason to try not to touch. So in that case organ donation will be a little difficult. But then if you want to be in the way of the Elders or the bodhisattva way – if you want the bodhisattva way you should know it and remember. You have to go quickly when you go. Don’t linger around, that would be a big problem. These are my thoughts.

0:32:14.3 Prayers before lunch

0:37:17.8 afternoon session:

There is not much teaching left to be done. I want to bring some clarifications (gives some retreat-specific announcements)

0:41:35.3 Thank you to all of your for being here, not only being here, but paying attention and finding the way into the Odyssey to Freedom. I hope you have some use and help to yourself and friends and you put a lot of effort in to sitting here, coming here, driving, getting almost killed (laughs), I really appreciate what you have done and I hope it will be some help for you. Our main purpose is nothing but simply to do whatever we could help. If you could follow this properly it would be helpful, like every evening we did the meditation and especially this morning I went up like 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 up to 64 and backwards. Then sometimes whooping them around. I did that this morning, which shows you how you can easily handle that. At first you have to have some basic comprehension. Once you know that, then you need to know the order in which it follows. You can go here and there, but yet you get to your main point. It is all adjustable. That is your direction to developing yourself. I really hope people will attempts at that.

0:43:32.4 I was just reading another letter from a great master which says:

Our life is very short. It is almost like last night's dream. We are like the people who have joined in the traditional festivals; the moment it is over, everybody goes away. Our lives are like that.

Seeking and working for the eight worldly dharmas is like a little child playing. The worldly dharmas have no meaning, those have no value; we shouldn't have attachment to those things.

For those of you who don't know what the eight worldly dharmas are, they are actually ego-boosting activities, like pride; you dislike it if somebody says bad things to you, you like it if somebody says you are great, you will go out of your way to get that person to say, " Oh you are great;" all these types of things are worldly dharmas99

All your accomplishments, achievements and success in life look like good things, but they will let you down in the end. Even if you become a Brahma or Indra, you will also disappear. So there is no meaning, there is no value, there is no essence.

The essence and value are only with your Dharma practice. What can help you at the time of death is only your Dharma

99 Literature: Geshe Ngawang Dhargyey, An Anthology of well-spoken advice, pg. 173176, 181-222.

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practice. What makes you perfect in life is only your Dharma practice. Therefore, bring all your efforts to Dharma practice.

It is not good enough just to know what dharma is. It is necessary for you to practice. If you become a scholar, that doesn't help. If you are a very good presenter of Dharma, that doesn't help. If you can meditate and sit like a mountain, that doesn't help. If you can say a lot of mantras, that doesn't help. Then what really helps you? The three principles of the path: 1) seeking freedom from neuroses; 2) ultimate love and compassion, 3) wisdom. 'These are the only three things that will help you. These three you can gain through the practice of Lamrim.

Just to have heard the Lamrim is not enough; just to have comprehension of the Lamrim is not enough. Whatever you have heard, whatever you have comprehended, you must meditate upon, you must analyze, and it must make a difference to your mind.

The way you can make a difference is by analyzing; which is analytical meditation — point by point. But before you do that, it is important to have a brief meditation from point number I to point number 64. Thereafter, you spend some short period every day on a point, embracing human life, and so forth. If you put in that effort everyday, within a month or two definitely you will gain the first spiritual development within you. You start with the lower points. And you will not move to the second point until you have established the first one. By doing this, experience of the three principles of the paths will definitely be developed within you. On top of that, you add concentrated meditation [shamata] and insight meditation [vipasyana]. If you combine them together enlightenment is not that far.

This is the way you can maintain the busy responsibilities of household, family, children and business, yet still you spend a few hours to think and meditate on this great path. This is how, even if you are busy with family life, your development grows day by day. This is one of the great ways to do it.

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This is how we take the essence of our life. This is the way we can fulfill our personal needs and others' needs. If you practice, even if you are in a family household, even then you can obtain enlightenment, just like Marpa did and many other Tibetans and great Indian Buddhist rulers, too. And if you don't practice, even if you sit on top of the Himalayas, nothing is going to happen. You will be like the groundhog who goes and sits under the ground, and comes back the same old groundhog.

To make such a profound practice perfect also depends on your karma, on your enthusiasm and willingness and praying to receive blessings; all of them together. Therefore, make use of your supreme field of merit and develop merit. Purify negativities. Purification and accumulation combined together will boost your journey.

You always have great respect and pray to the Lama yidam inseparable and also ask the dakas and dakinis and dhama protectors to help you to complete your journey.

From here the author goes backward again. I wanted to share this with you, so that you can see the way and how you can practice. First, go through that list completely and sort of have a rough idea, then try to go little more elaborately and try to comprehend. At the same time, do not just read the list, but apply whatever your understanding is, and say, " This is what it is, may I be blessed to be able to develop this and that." You can do that one step at a time, or you can do three or four steps together. Once you do that, if you keep on doing that, within a month or two, or three, you will begin to see the first development within you. It is such a wonderful way of developing ourselves. Really, it is almost unthinkable we have that in the United States, in the mid-west, in the middle of Michigan. It is an opportunity and it is great, so I hope it will have an effect and be of help to you.

0:54:10.5 Those of you who are in small groups of Jewel Heart in your area, you have people there to talk to and connect and have meetings and those who are living by yourself somewhere in Idaho or somewhere you may remain in touch with people in Jewel Heart. We do have our website and we have your email too. Then you can always call.

When you decide to put in efforts, don’t leave a big gap in between. If you can do it every day it’s best, but at least twice or something in a week. Then it is constantly maintained with you and you get the opportunity to get in with that.

0:56:00. I want to take opportunity to thank everybody for coming and staying here and tolerating all the difficult conditions.

(then thanking everybody individually, organizers, facilitators, volunteers, cooks, etc.)

1:11:17.4 Questions and Answers:

Audience: When Tokden Rinpoche was here he gave oral transmission. Can you explain what that was?

Rimpoche: Oral transmission is the sound of whatever practice you do, if you hear that sound. You again hear it from one human being to another human being’s ear, that sound. Sort of transmitted orally. If you give explanation on that then it becomes a teaching. Oral transmission means just to transmit the sound. You have had that a number of times, but what he did was the Ganden Lhagyema and Foundation of all Perfections. That’s what you received.

Audience: Those who want to take refuge seriously (in tomorrow’s White Tara initiation) what are they aggreing to and what are the implications?

Rimpoche: Great. I think you have to make up your mind before you take this initiation then. What you are agreeing to is relying totally on Buddha, Dharma and Sangha, both the historial Buddha and the Buddha within you, the Dharma and Sangha within you. That is what is called refuge taking: relying on. That is what you are really committing to. Then also, by taking refuge to Buddha, Dharma and Sangha you do not worship ghosts and spirits and all those, who themselves are not free from suffering. By taking refuge in Dharma you don’t harm or hurt anybody. Non-violence should be in your principle of functioning. By taking refuge in Sangha, it will also tell you that you don’t want too much association with non-virtuous friends, because they are a danger to you losing.

Friends are very important. It is very hard for one bad person to become a good person. For a good practitioner, a good person, to become bad, is very easy. That’s the reason why – it is very easy. They normally give you the example. Let’s say the monks have a household with senior teacher, deputy and then a couple of other younger students altogether and they share all their lives together in one group. It’s almost like a semi-family type of thing. About that they say: if the teacher sleeps late, all the students are bound to sleep late. All the bad things are quite contagious and easy to get, easy to catch. It is like a flu or other virus goes around and everybody is getting stomach problems and have to run.

Then they have to cough and sneeze and do all this and you doing that. Just like that, a non-virtuous friend is very easy to affect us. By taking refuge to Sangha you try to maintain virtuous friends. It is very simple; if you are keeping company with somebody who is smoking cigarettes, then chances are that much more that you are going to pick it up. And if you are keeping company with people who are not smok-

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ing, you have a lesser possibility of becoming a smoker. That works for all the negative and positive karmas. By taking refuge in Sangha, you try to maintain the company of good friends. That's what you are committing to.

Audience: Can you explain a little bit more about the five paths?

Rimpoche: Gate Gate Paragate Parasamgate Bodhi Soha – there is a tape on that. We have both audio and video of that teaching series. We did that for 6 months to a year. So tonight, I simply say Gate Gate Paragate Parasamgate Bodhi Soha. But basically, path is to accumulate merit

That is called Path of Accumulation. Then on the second step your priority will be to take some action, different actions. There are four stages: heat, peak, patience and best of Dharma. Path Nr. 3 is the Path of Seeing, realizing the true nature. Path Nr 4: whatever you realized you are meditating on that. It has 10 stages or bhumis. Then comes the path of no more learning. The first Gate is path of accumulation. The second Gate is the path of action. Paragate is the path of seeing. Paramsamgate is the path of meditation. Bodhi Soha is no more learning, becoming Buddha. Just very brief.

Audience: Will all human beings ultimately be liberated? Is the consciousness that we have that goes from life to life, a permanent thing, does it go on all the way to liberation?

Rinpoche: All human beings are bound to get enlightened eventually. But there is a technical difficulty. The technical difficulty is if you say human beings are permanent, it doesn't work. If human beings are impermanent, then why don't they disappear? They don't disappear, they change. Trungpa Rinpoche used such an interesting word, he called it 'continuation of discontinuity'. That is how human beings continue: as a continuation of discontinuity. Everybody will become a buddha eventually and it is entirely up to us. The opportunities are there and you can do it. If you don't want to — fine, try again next time.

Audience: Can you share some more about Allen Ginsberg?

Rimpoche: As you all know Allen as been a wonderful friend and part and parcel of Jewel Heart.

He was so concerned, so caring for the well-being of the people, America and Americans and all people, and particularly people in Jewel Heart, people in Naropa Institute and all of those he worked with so much. We all know and don’t even have to say how much he has done. He has tremendously contributed to Jewel Heart in various ways, by giving inspiration to people, helping me to say the right thing and helping each and every member of Jewel Heart. He would take each one as sort of a personal family member. It’s been really hard, we miss him terribly.

I am sure many of us remember, that even whoever wrote the clumsiest poetry, he would sit there and talk to them, correct the language and try to make it perfect as much as possible. And for me personally he tried to bring the correct language, tried to get me to read some English books, tried to make me say the right things and really throughout his life he made the efforts to make me speak English so that people can understand better. In short, I would really like to say he put his heart and soul toward the benefit of people. Things that he did in the 60’s, if those had not been done, the openness of the 80’s and 90’s would not be there. The openness of the 80’s and 90’s, and the actual Dharma practice which affects millions of people’s lives, he made possible to take root, through all these efforts that he made. If you keep on counting what Allen has done, you can go on talking for eighteen years and you will not be able to complete the picture. That is how much of a contribution he has made.

As far as his experience of passing away, I was in Mexico and Allen made a phone call and when I picked up the telephone he said, “This is Allen Ginsberg.” I said, “Well how are you? How are you doing?” And he said, “Well I would like to make my report. This is Allen Ginsberg and I have just been diagnosed with liver cancer, and it is incurable,” and all these formal things that normally Allen does, he did all of that. It was sad indeed, and then he told me, “Boy I am so surprised that I took it so well. I thought a few years ago I would have hit the ceiling, but I am so surprised at myself, how well I took it. I made it easy for the doctors to say it. They walked in the room and I looked at them and they said, ‘Not very good news.’ So I said, ‘Cancer?’ So he said, ‘uh huh.’ Then I said, ‘Incurable?’ He said, ‘uh huh’. So I helped the doctor say it easily.” That’s what Allen said. And then he told me the doctors told him one to four months, but, “Judging from my own weakness I don’t think I have that long. Maybe a month or two or so,” he said. Then for Allen, he accepted it, he really accepted it easily and for me, it took three days to accept. It was not easy for me. I had to sit down and think, “We all die and all this and that.” It took me three days to accept. Allen seemed to be accepting it straight away. And not only that, he immediately got busy finalizing, and it was almost like a celebration going on there. People were going in, coming out, it was like a big ceremony, some kind of a festival. Of course, you all know, he started calling a number of people, and told he was very concerned about Jewel Heart and he said Jewel Heart has not been able to become established properly financially. He said, “That is my biggest worry.”

So it was like a big celebration for Allen, the way and how he departed. And it was also open, completely, absolutely open. He had a life that was absolutely open, he had a death that was absolutely open. I was sort of surprised when I reached there in the evening. There must have been 70 or 80 or even a 100 people there in the hall and Allen was on the bed. I called Phillip in the morning. I had just been informed of what happened. So Phillip said he would call. I said, “Don’t call, just go there and do your practice.” So Phillip spent the whole day there. There were so many people, so many people, about a hundred people must have been there, all sorts of people; famous people, not-so-famous people and everybody. There was food, plenty of Chinese food on the table for people to eat, and apple cider, orange juice, coca cola and all that type of thing available there. There was a doctor who tried to explain what was wrong, his cousin. It was like a festival or picnic or some kind of big party and within that, also way in the other side, we tried to say our prayers; all the bells were ringing and the damarus were singing, all of them happening together. And also picking of souvenirs by different people, all happening simultaneously. So there was nothing hidden. He made his life open and died in openness. And I needed a few minutes’ quietness, so when I walked in, everybody came behind me. I looked around, I was almost getting, people almost jumping on top of one another trying to see what was going on. And I turned around and said, “Could you give me a minute?” That was what happened.

He actually passed away about 2:38 and his consciousness remained till 11:30 (the next night). I was observing very carefully and so about 11, 11:25, I looked, and the consciousness was still there. And at 11.30 it was gone. So this period passed and we said, “Now you can call the undertakers.” We had been postponing their coming. We had been postponing and postponing by every two hours, four hours. That was exactly what happened and finally we were very fortunate to bring Allen’s body to Jewel Heart in New York, where we had the Mahamudra lineage prayer said, and his body was rolled in. We were able to have a meaningful service in Jewel Heart. That was Sunday night. And also, there were quite a number of us, so what we did was complete self-initiation of Heruka, Yamantaka, Vajrayogini, all of them we were able to do. The time was such that it worked out. Early in the morning, around a little after five or six a.m., around about that time, there were not so many people there. We were almost alone. There might have been one or two. So I took the opportunity to give Allen the complete initiation of Vajrayogini at that moment which I was very happy to be able to do.

We miss him terribly, but we dedicate all our positive karma to fulfil whatever wishes he may have, wherever he is. Those of us who really think a lot about the way and how to commemorate; it is to remember his concern, his message and his teaching, honesty, openness.

For me, one great thing was, during the early part when Jewel Heart was forming, Allen taught spontaneous poetry in Ann Arbor. For me to make an attempt to learn poetry is a joke because I can’t even speak English properly, so forget about poetry; however I went there. In the workshop, Allen said, “Whatever you think, say it right now at this moment or look through the window and what you see, say it.” That sort of workshop. I was not participating. I was sitting in the corner there and suddenly Allen said, “Rinpoche, what do you think, say it right now.” My thought suddenly came, “I don’t want to fall into the shoes of Jimmy and Tammy Fae Baker.” That was the period [when that scandal was in the news]. He talked to me for a long time, not only during that period, even much later. “If you are afraid of that, you have to be open. Whatever you do is up to you, but be open. Don’t have anything hiding behind. If you don’t have a closet to be worried about, everything’s fine.” And it was great advice to me and so I have tried not to hide anything. And that is a great help and that also has been a tremendous personal help.

Okay, we have tomorrow still.

How to meditate on the points — Guided meditation

The subjects that we have covered today, we meditate on.

I meditate and pray to Lama Buddha Shakyamuni to realize that the time of death is uncertain. Light and liquid comes from the body of Lama Shakyamuni, purifies my negativities in general and particularly [obstacles to] realizing that the time of death is uncertain. Finally, a duplicate Lama dissolves to me, and I gain the realization that the time of death is very uncertain. I never know what's going to happen in the next minute. Therefore, whatever time and opportunity I have, may I make the best use of it. May such a power develop within me.

When I die, may I be able to die with positive thoughts and a positive attitude; may I be free of all negative thoughts, negative conditions. May Lama Buddha Shakyamuni help me and be with me, be my guide, and hopefully I will be received by

241 Day Six: Step 31 – 49

the great masters, great yidams, great enlightened beings with their reception parties. May I be received, may I hear the music of the pure land, may I be lead and carried to, uplifted to the pure lands or to the great human rebirth. May I be free of all these narrow passages of the bardo. Even if I have to go through the narrow passage of the bardo, may I be able to go through properly. A duplicate Lama comes and assures for me to be able to do that if I follow the karmic principle.

I also pray and seek assurance to be able to avoid rebirth in the hell realm, rebirth in the hungry ghost and animal realms and even to avoid a human life with all kinds of limitations. I do not want to take rebirth as a demi-god or samsaric god. I must have the wisdom of knowing what harms and what helps in my life and my death and my bardo. The first priority I have is: what helps in my life, what harms in life. What harms in life harms in the future, and that automatically harms my bardo. May I be free of all these negativities that ham me, that destroy my life, my death and my bardo. May I be free of them.

I realize that positive karma gives positive results, I realize negative karma gives negative results. I would like to purify all my negativities, my negative karma, by applying the four powers. May I be able to do that. Lama Buddha Tupwang 92 please bless me to be able to do that. Light and liquid comes from the body of the Lama and reaches within us; we gain realization of karmic functioning and at the same time purify all negativities. A duplicate Lama dissolves to me and I achieve permanent awareness of negative and positive karmic consequences and ability to make the right choice.

If I cannot make the right choice, as long as I am born again in samsara, there is a life full of suffering. Everything has suffering in nature. It is contaminated and I am in it and I would

92 Tupwang is Tibetan for Sakyamuni.

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Day Six: Step 31 - 49

like to be free, but how can I do it? Where do I look? Where do I begin to work? Ha, the message from Buddha says begin to look at the cause. What causes me to do these negative actions? Of course it is my thoughts. Where do my thoughts come from? These thoughts are produced within me by my neuroses, therefore the real source of my sufferings are the neuroses that I have. So I must be free from those neuroses, I do need liberation. May Lama Shakyamuni bless me to be able to have that liberation.

Light and liquid comes, purifies all negativities in general and particularly [obstacles to realizing] the basic understanding of life that Buddha presented in the form of the Four Noble Truths. That is absolutely relevant to how our lives are functioning. To understand that clearly, a duplicate Buddha comes and gains for me the realization of the understanding of the Four Noble Truths. With the protection of taking refuge, may I be able to insure that my next life may not be that much of a suffering nature.

But I am not sure what happens thereafter. Therefore it is necessary for me to have that total eradication of suffering. So I seek liberation.

If I alone am free, that is not good enough. When I look at the persons that are connected with me; my nearest, my dearest, my companion, lover, family, children, parents, great-grand parents, all of them, we are in the same condition. We are in the same boat. As much as I recognize my suffering, they have equally as much; they have suffering, but more than I do; not equal but more. In particular, they don't know they are suffering, in particular, they have no way of knowing how to get free themselves. So here I am, a person, friend, companion, committed, having some idea about it. If I let them down, will I be a nice person? No I won't be a nice person, I will be mean, I will be selfish. Therefore, I must be a nice person. I must take care of at least those people who are my concern,

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and expand it to all human beings. Expand it, first to the room, expand it to the country, finally expand it to the whole universe. Then shrink it back, shrink it back to the concerned person, checking within me: do I respect that person, do I give this person equal importance and equal respect as I give to myself? Then I begin to see the inequality. This inequality that I perceive is actually baseless. There is no basis for it whatsoever. I can simply say, It's me!" so that I seem more important, but that is not true. The other one Will also say the same thing. It is baseless, it is false ground on which I am perceiving. So I must gain equal respect, equally honoring the wishes of other beings that I am concerned about.

I also have to remember the kindness they share with me. I also have to help them because they help me. I appreciate what they have done, what they are doing, I generate my love, through which I wish them to be happy and joyful.

Simply wishing them to be happy and joyful might not be able to materialize what I am wishing, so therefore I must act and function. I must do something to make them free from their suffering. In order to act to free them from suffering I must desire the inspiration of freeing them from all their suffering. I generate a strong motivation, motivated thoughts to free them from all sufferings. May Lama Buddha help me to be able to grow this.

Light and liquid comes from the body of Buddha, purifies the negativities in general and particularly those that prevent me from developing compassion and eliminating selfishness, the uncaring, inhumane attitude that I have. I get purified completely, and develop equanimity, love, compassion within me.

How to meditate on the points

— A letter from a great master I was just reading another letter here. It says:

Our life is very short. It is almost like last night's dream. We are like the people who have joined in the traditional festivals; the moment it is over, everybody goes away. Our lives are like that.

Seeking and working for the eight worldly dharmas is like a little child playing. The worldly dharmas have no meaning, those have no value; we shouldn't have attachment to those things.

For those of you who don't know what the eight worldly dharmas are, they are actually ego-boosting activities, like pride; you dislike it if somebody says bad things to you, you like it if somebody says you are great, you will go out of your way to get that person to say, " Oh you are great;" all these types of things are worldly dharmas99

All your accomplishments, achievements and success in life look like good things, but they will let you down in the end. Even if you become a Brahma or Indra, you will also disappear. So there is no meaning, there is no value, there is no essence.

The essence and value are only with your Dharma practice. What can help you at the time of death is only your Dharma

99 Literature: Geshe Ngawang Dhargyey, An Anthology of well-spoken advice, pg. 173176, 181-222.

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practice. What makes you perfect in life is only your Dharma practice. Therefore, bring all your efforts to Dharma practice.

It is not good enough just to know what dharma is. It is necessary for you to practice. If you become a scholar, that doesn't help. If you are a very good presenter of Dharma, that doesn't help. If you can meditate and sit like a mountain, that doesn't help. If you can say a lot of mantras, that doesn't help. Then what really helps you? The three principles of the path: 1) seeking freedom from neuroses; 2) ultimate love and compassion, 3) wisdom. 'These are the only three things that will help you. These three you can gain through the practice of Lamrim.

Just to have heard the Lamrim is not enough; just to have comprehension of the Lamrim is not enough. Whatever you have heard, whatever you have comprehended, you must meditate upon, you must analyze, and it must make a difference to your mind.

The way you can make a difference is by analyzing; which is analytical meditation — point by point. But before you do that, it is important to have a brief meditation from point number I to point number 64. Thereafter, you spend some short period every day on a point, embracing human life, and so forth. If you put in that effort everyday, within a month or two definitely you will gain the first spiritual development within you. You start with the lower points. And you will not move to the second point until you have established the first one. By doing this, experience of the three principles of the paths will definitely be developed within you. On top of that, you add concentrated meditation [shamata] and insight meditation [vipasyana]. If you combine them together enlightenment is not that far.

This is the way you can maintain the busy responsibilities of household, family, children and business, yet still you spend a few hours to think and meditate on this great path. This is how, even if you are busy with family life, your development grows