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Soundfile 19980424GRJHNLBOA02

Speaker Gelek Rimpoche

Location Nijmegen

Topic On the Border of Awakening

Transcriber Constantijn Koopman

Date December 6, 2021

Good morning everybody. And welcome for this two-days workshop that we’’re supposed to do. Again, the workshop is…… how this is going to be, it is true to the Buddhist tradition, yet main focus on our…… Let me put this way: it is coming from the Buddhist tradition and true to the Buddhist tradition, yet we will emphasize more on practical level, rather than philosophical or theoretical, but practical level of everyday’’s dealing with the life.

Buddhist tradition because that’’s only I know. I don’’t know anything else. So, if I don’’t know anything else, I can’’t talk to you. Because I don’’t know. And yet it will try to be very practical because, you know, Buddha’’s teaching…… If you look in the every single teaching that available in Buddhist teaching, is absolutely relevant to our life today, even it is 2,5000 years later. Because purpose of Buddha’’s message is based on his own personal experience, and way and how we can make ourselves and others better.

And of course, it is very important to help others to make the others better. 0:03:05.5 But the first step we have to help ourselves and make ourselves feel better. Not feel better, it is the slip word there. Make ourselves better. It is important to help ourselves. And if we can help ourselves we may have a chance to help others. This is almost contrary to the everybody who says love, compassion, must help and this and that. But it’’s almost contrary. But the true reality is: if you can’’t you help yourself, how can you help others? If you try to help somebody without helping yourself, you get into a lot of problem. We all know that.

It is same thing in our daily life: if I can’’t help myself physically or financially, and when I try to help somebody else, and then it’’s going to be big problem for both of us. Tibetans have a saying: when you have a hundred yaks, and if one yak is unable to do it, and that make all hundred yaks difficult. Because the load the one yak is carrying has to be divided. Maybe, sometimes they produce one tired yak will make a hundred yaks tired.

So, we make our house order first. 0:06:09.6 And that’’s the normal way isn’’t it? Right or wrong? I think so, because if you can’’t help yourself, you try to help others: big trouble. That doesn’’t mean you shouldn’’t help others. Again, don’’t misunderstand me. Really! Likewise, the spiritual path is the same thing. And if you cannot help yourself, how can you expect to help others? It is very important question. If you can’’t help yourself, if you try to help others, it’’s not going to work. Not going to work because of our negative emotions will rise. Then, we indulge in very variety of trouble.

And that’’s why we have a problem now with, for example, guru business. Even in America, now they say big G-word. They won’’t even say guru, they sag big G-word. And some of them being good, some of them being bad. So, some of them are fake. Some are real??? [laughter] Yeah, really! True. So what happens is: because of when their own personal negative emotions rises, and then they abuse people. And when they started abusing people, and when you begin to realize your abusing, or people started criticizing, then you have an answer. Said???, ““Oh, skillful means.”” [laughs] Well, it is very hard for anybody to say it is a skillful means and no, and very hard to say anybody it’’s not skillful means. 0:06:09.8 Because we don’’t know as a person to person whether it is good or bad or. We don’’t know, so we cannot judge. And so, people take advantage of that. Okay, I better shut up then.

That’’s the one of the reasons why I say, unless you can help yourself, you cannot help others. If you try to do it, you make a mess. And there’’s many other reasons to. And that’’s why, whenever you are selecting or choosing a guru or something, it is always you, the individual, carefully select and has to choose. Rather than: guru will come over and say, ““Hey, I’’m your guru.”” Really true! So, the moment when you begin to say, ““Hey, I’’m your guru,”” my normal advice to the people is: run away five hundred miles without looking back. No matter whoever, whatever it might be, you know.

And sometimes, even in organizations.. We are very lucky Jewel Heart doesn’’t do that. But some organizations will say, ““You belong to us.”” Luckily. You know, nobody belongs to anybody. You know that. Nobody is belong to anybody, everybody comes together because you like a certain thing in there. And of course, we do keep in principle (and I’’m sure it’’s maintained in Holland), we do keep in principle to find if sort of somebody didn’’t show up for many times. 0:12:10.4 We give you one horn??? and find out what’’s wrong or anything wrong. And day after, nobody will chase you. This is our principle. We follow here, right? And there’’s some people who try to chase you around everywhere. So, that’’s not good. It shouldn’’t be there.

So coming back to our thing, and helping ourselves is the first priority. So, now you may think, ““I can help myself. I can help myself, I’’m okay. I’’m physically well and nothing wrong with me. Just now, I can do, I can get up, I can cook myself, and I can wash my clothes and I can go to do my shopping.””And all this. We’’re not talking about that help. I don’’t have to clarify that very much because we have a lot of…… Everybody knows you can go to the therapy and they can help. And when you needed, you need to go to therapy. And all these are sort of common knowledge now.

Years ago, every problem whatever we have we contribute to the external contribution. [to the translator] Have you said that? External contribution. Meaning, if you’’re ill, you get something from outside. If you become old, you get from somebody upside??. And if you’’re not well, it’’s all external thing. Years ago, we think that way. And then we know: its not only external, it’’s internal. And then we have all these psychologists and psychotherapists and all of them become busy. 0:15:00.9 And even you talk to the psychotherapist or psychologist, they will probably tell you, ““We get to the bottom of your problem.”” And you go down. You go down up to ??? You know, you sit there and talk and talk and talk and talk and try to get back to when you’’re young, what happened. And then, sometimes remembers something happened. And sometimes people don’’t remember anything. Then, you know, the therapists can very clearly, very cleverly suggest in the form of question. ““So, don’’t you remember you’’re afraid.”” ““O yeah, I do remember I’’m afraid.”” ““Very afraid of what?”” ““Afraid of bearded person.”” Or something, example. ““Aha. Who is bearded person in your family? Is it your father or your uncle?”” [laughs]

That’’s one way of doing it. The others, who really does very seriously and try to find…… I mean, both, even the bearded one is also very seriously trying to get to the bottom of the cause of whatever the problem is. And it is helpful. You know, when I tell you of the bearded one, looks like, sounds like sarcastic. But believe me: I am not an anti-therapist. Not On the contrary, therapy and Buddhism goes very, very together. Very together. Why? The therapists can trace and what went wrong within the memory of the individual. 0:18:07.1

And Buddhism goes one step behind that: what was the cause? It’’s not the instant what you have in your life, but it’’s more than that instant, also what it is. So, Buddhism looks in that way. So, the therapists contribute to Buddhist ideas because they search through incidents that happened in your life. And Buddhists contribute to the therapists because it gives you the one step beyond and more background, more in the bottom, than what we think in the bottom of the cause. So, the bearded one, we have to conclude there, because you cannot go behind that. So having said that, how come Buddhists be able to go beyond that? It is the Buddha’’s experience. And that make us to go beyond. Don’’t think Buddhism as something like a religion, where you can pray and worship and then getting answers. I mean, in a way it is, but on the other hand in principle in Buddhism it’’s not.

A year ago, last year some time, the Dalai Lama came to America. And he had an interview with Larry King live. Now, I’’m sure everybody knows that, right? Larry King live. 0:21:00.0 And after Dalai Lama, two people came. One is US senator, and another was Richard Gere. And Larry King called Richard Gere ““Richard Buddhist.”” And his question was: some people say Buddhist is way of life, some people say Buddhism is religion, some people say Buddhism is philosophy. What is it? And he said, ““All there both???”” So, that’’s what it is. It’’s a religion in the sense it liberates the individual. It is a philosophy because it has great thoughts and searching for the truth. It is a way of life because if makes difference to our life. So, it is all of them. Why it is all of them? Because Richard Gere says so. [laughs] That’’s a joke, don’’t take it so seriously.

So, if it is a way of life, if it is a philosophy, if it is a religion, how do we content??? ourselves? Now, let me deal with this first: do I have to be Buddhist before I practice whatever? Do I have to be Buddhist? And do I have to believe in karma? Do I have to believe in reincarnation. These are the very basic questions. I don’’t think anybody has any answer. I don’’t know. Because whatever you think you can say it, and if you say it, if there is a contradiction, a valid contradiction, then we know the idea is wrong. 0:24:12.3

I do not know whether you are familiar with Tricycle? Not so much, okay? It is one of those Buddhist magazines, comes out of New York. There are three or four of them. One is Shambala, one is Tricycle. These are sort of more mainstream magazine comes out. I don’’t know where it comes out: the Tricycle comes out from New York, I don’’t know Shambala. Shambala must be from Boston or something.

So, there is a debate between Robert Thurman and Stephen Batchelor. And Robert Thurman says, ““You have to take refuge, you have to believe in reincarnation or you have to believe in karma. And Stephen Batchelor says, ““No!”” So, the debate is: one made one statement, the other made the another statement. There’’s no really debate. [laughs] Now, the traditional Tibetan or even early Indian system, it’’s that who made the statement, it doesn’’t end there. Doesn’’t end there and we take that debate, that idea. And we check. 27:00:0 And if it’’s going against our direct knowledge, then we know that is wrong.

Example is, this is old example. It sounds funny, but is old example: if you’’re going through a big far farm land or somewhere, if you’’re traveling through farm land somewhere, and in the middle you find…… Sometimes, you know, they have cow dungs put together and made a pile of it, or maybe stands of wood maybe standing there. So, when you’’re looking from a distance, when you’’re coming from the distance, your eye can see them, ““Oh, a man. A person is there, a person there.”” Right? So, you think you see a man. You presume it is a man. And you believe it is man. So, you think there is man. Then you go on, go on walking.

Then, there’’s two ways of defusing this confusion, two ways. So one way is, when another person comes from there, and then you meet that person. So, you say, ““What happened to the other person?”” And then he’’ll say, ““Which person? Where?”” He says, ““Over there.”” ““And he will say, ““Oh, that’’s not a person. That is a tree trunk or tree stamp/stand???””, or something. So, then you defuse the idea that that is a human being, and that defuse was caused by another person who directly saw it and heard and felt, telling you you’’re wrong. 0:30:14.0 And this is called indirect defusion of wrong understanding. Because it’’s not your direct experience, but you’’re learning from somebody else. Now, the second one is: you walk up to that level. Nobody you meet, you walk up to that level, and you see it with your own eyes: it’’s a tree stand, not a human being. And the moment you see that, you said, ““Ah, it’’s a tree, it’’s not a man.”” So, mind that is perceiving, ““This is man,”” it disappeared from you. Right or wrong? You do that, right? Nobody had any answer. But it is: truly speaking, that’’s what it is. So, we call that direct.

So, I shared this with you because that will be in principle, that is very much in principle we have to deal with everything. Almost we say something…… You know, like sometimes in the West they say, ““I believe it if I see it.”” It’’s very much similar to that.

Let’’s put one step beyond that. You see that tree trunk as a man, and you don’’t see that has any movement. So, your first thoughts, if you watch your thoughts, the first thoughts will be, ““I don’’t know. Maybe, it is somebody very tired and taking rest with the heavy rucksack.”” 0:33:16.2 The second thought will come, ““Oh, that person may be sick.”” So, all sorts of ideas that we build up. Right? And these thoughts and ideas are built up on the basis of confusion and lack of knowledge that that was not a person. Can you see that? So, it is basically the same situation within our life.

That’’s why Buddha said, ““Ignorance is the total cause of suffering.”” Why? Ignorance causes confusion. Confusion causes all those. So, I would like to make that clear first of all: all our problems are based on confusion. That is according to Buddha, and it is true in our life. When you really understand, we don’’t have a problem. The problem is a lack of understanding, that’’s why we have. And having said that, you may think, ““How can it be possible?”” When you’’re sick, you’’re sick. And when you’’re unhappy, I’’m unhappy. How can you say it is confusion? 0:36:03.7 And I’’m not saying it’’s confusion, I’’m saying it’’s caused by confusion. And when you’’re sick, you’’re sick –– it’’s real. And when you’’re unhappy, you’’re unhappy –– its’’ real. So, so and forth.

So, then what are you talking? The cause of all these problems are confusion. And I tell you why: it is not only the suffering that too much, but the perception of the suffering which makes a big difference. If you perceive it is a huge, that you’’re unable to handle, it’’s miserable, it’’s this and that, and that the perception will give you much more problem than the problem itself. Now, I have an interesting example. There is a woman named Gloria in Jewel Heart in Ann Arbor. No, Jewel Heart in…… Yeah, Michigan, she’’s not in Ann Arbor, but…… And she was driving one day. And while driving, she said a car in front of her took speed and zoom went off. And the police came and gave her the ticket. And she tried to tell the police, ““It’’s not me, it’’s car before me.”” And police said, ““Sure, sure, yeah.”” [laughs] 0:39:07.4

So, then she’’s so upset, so angry. And she came to talk to me. And she was literally shaking, so angry. ““A,”” she said, ““it’’s not me, it’’s person in front of me. And B, police didn’’t listen to me.”” And C, she has to pay the fine. And D, she has share??? her insurance will increase. And all of those going in on her head. First, she’’s crying and hysterical. You know, really. I said, ““Just come, sit down and cool down.”” And, ““We don’’t know that yet. So we don’’t know whether there’’s going to be increase or whatever it is. So, you’’re looking at this and so what you’’re really perceiving, is not only a perceiving the current suffering, but also perceiving the future two years of insurance increased and unable to meet your budget. And all of those came up together, you’’re perceiving.”” You know, what I’’m talking about it? So, that’’s the perception I’’m talking about. Or incidentally, Gloria’’s insurance did not rise. It really didn’’t. And also, she doesn’’t have to pay the fine. Somehow, she went to court and find out she’’s not the real one. So anyway, that gives enough suffering there for about a week or ten days.

So, it is the perception. And sometimes, really there’’s nothing and we perceive a tremendous suffering. And so it has good and bad both. I mean, you cannot ignore completely because there is. 0:42:06.9 So, naturally, you sort of take it bit by bit, rather than try to solve everything. And deal the problem with one by one when it’’s there, rather than try to deal everything which you cannot even handle. It’’s become overwhelming.

So, when you look at it very carefully within ourselves, let me sort of tell you how they arise. You know, when you begin to look in our own mind, we sort of perceive me, I and me without any analyzing, without any putting efforts, some kind of projection saying I and me. Sort of ready-made over here. Don’’t you think so? I mean, think by yourself, within you. And you don’’t have to…… nobody thinks, ““Where I come from”” or ““What is I, how is it coming?”” don’’t think anybody will think about it. Majority, but some people will like to know, ““Who am I?””, and which I don’’t care. But our normal thoughts will stop. That’’s the place where the bug stops I??? Then, it becomes mine. 0:45:03.6 The next steps is mine. And that’’s where we’’re very active: my hand or my flower, my table. Right? So, when somebody else is there, you say, ““How can you use my table? It’’s my table.”” So, all of those, the my-business where we’’re very active, my and yours. So, you’’re intruding in my territory. So, you must get out of my territory, otherwise I will kill you. So, it’’s all of those are coming out of my-business. [0:46:10]

[Here, the sounds falls away, recording stops at 0:46:18]